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139,441 Literary Works • 672,564 Reviews
I've got no comments towards this poem. everything seems to be ok, no grammar mistakes seen as I read through the stanzas. This is the most sad poem I've read so far. is this a true story or did you write it out of nowhere?
Good job, keep it up
This is just fudgered because it does happen all because one person did you wrong no one else can get in, I know because it's happened. I liked this when I read the title I thought it was in link or inspiration of crying in the rain by the Everly Brothers, I love that song but anyhoo this was great =}
Hello Demonness,
I believe this would go under 'lyrics' yes? Or if you meant it as a poem then at least under lyric poetry. Or even 'other poetry', anything but dramatic.
In any case I took a look at the original song's English translation (in order to compare/see what you did). Since you didn't give me a title (of the original swedish song), I had to google it. Actually, what I'm looking at is a tumblr post, so nothing even official (for all I know, you wrote the tumblr post). But from the tumblr post and from what you have here, it's too similar. It looks like you translated the song into English, shortened it/rewrote it in a specific form - and you told us as much. But from what I could see, you didn't make much changes to the original work. In any case, the idea is still Newkid's. Even the words, though translated, are still the same. Nothing about the concept, images, or words is changed and this isn't so much a reaction piece, as just a rewriting in a different language and cutting out a few things to make it rhyme in English. I didn't see that you added anything new or anything that is your own. I could be wrong, as I said, for all I know, you wrote the tumblr post.
The point is, the work is still newkid's. I know you mentioned it in the spoiler, but since you need to credit the original author, I wouldn't put it in a spoiler. I would put it at the very top in bold, and I would include not just the author (or band? I'm not sure) but the title of the song as well.
These are just copyright issues/precautions, you might not be aware of it, but it is a serious issue, and one which is better to take precautions than not. I'll be free to explain in greater detail if you have any questions about copyright laws, just pm me.
In any case, this is an amazing piece. I'm glad that you shared it with us, as I for one, do not know Swedish and would have never come across it. But it's in the wrong place and doesn't have the correct attributions. Dramatic poetry forum is meant for original works that fit under the category and this is neither, so you can see why this is problematic.
~ As Always Audy