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Hi. Here for a quick review! I must say: this is absolutely excellent. There are so many layers and dimensions to your poem: I read it again and again until it painted a full picture in my mind. The drive and emotion and story behind such a simplistic piece of writing is mindblowing. Really beautiful. Anyway * like * and look forward to your next poem. How do say 'keep writing' in japenese - any ideas? Lol
-Alia

Hi-ya!!! It's so short and simple, that my mind over thinks it.....Not sure where it's going, but Brilliant!!!!

Well, I liked how it was short and simple, but I'm not sure what was going on here. I kind of get the picture of someone sitting, smoking in a musty library. So it painted a somewhat vague image, but I couldn't picked up on much emotion or a meaning behind it. Although it's nice the way it is, maybe you could elaborate, explain a little more to the reader, but if you're just trying to visulize a thought in your head, I think it worked out nicely.

Sorry I can't be more helpful with my advice, I'm still not very experienced in poetry or giving reviews. Overall I liked your style, how it was put together, it has good potential! Ah... I hope I'm not discouraging, and it's probably better not to listen to me anyway, I don't really know what I'm saying half the time!

Anyway, nice job! I would definately be interested in reading more of your writing!

<..> Kat