Did You Really Think You Could Win?

by FallenAngel97

Published April 24, 2012

In Poetry

DId you really think it would be that easy?
That easy to bring me down
Did you really think you could destroy me?
Destroy me with your words

Did you really think you could win?
And break my soul in two
Did you really think I'd believe you?
And all of your twisted lies

Well it isn't as easy as you thought
To make me give in to your hate
And I will not back down
I will fight until the end

You will never win
Not as long as I am here
For I don't need you or your hate
Crushing my spirit and weighing me down

Get out of my life
And quit messing with my head
You will never ruin me again
Not like you did before

I was weaker then
And stupid
But I have learned from my past
So I can safeguard my future
Comments & reviews · 3
IwillNOTbow2741 wrote a review Review · Jun 16, 2012

i love this.
"Well it isn't as easy as you thought
To make me give in to your hate
And I will not back down
I will fight until the end"
this is an excellent example of how to stand up for oneself.
every one of your poems gets me insistently hooked. i love how you infuse live raw emotion into every single one. keep up your awesome writing and never give up. more people care about you than you think.

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Lashea
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Lashea commented Comment · Apr 26, 2012

Nice, I like it. I am a fan f yur wrks and I havet been lately t review them s here I am now. Keep up the good work.

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TylynRae
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TylynRae wrote a review Review · Apr 26, 2012

Hey there =] I really liked where you were going with this piece. I think the overall message of this poem was something I could easily go for. It sort of feels like there's a bit of anger, maybe a tiny bit of confusion, sadness, irritation.

I read through the first few stanzas then reread through them trying to find a rhythm. I thought at first you were going to start rhyming, (Not that poems should always rhyme because by no means is that true) However, I couldn't identify a pattern in this. Especially at the end. I have several poems that I've written where the first stanzas have a pattern, but the last stanza sort of just stands alone. And sometimes that really works for a piece and makes it pop, but that only works when all of the other stanzas are relatively uniform with the pattern and what not.

overall. I think the idea of this poem was really great. The execution was a bit off (but thats just how I read it) and I think the stanzas could get cleaned up a bit.

Also. This kind of poem could be soooo emotional! Get us angry. Get us upset and passionate and broken and understanding and everything that we could possibly feel in this poem and put it in there. If this poem is about how you've felt before, tell us how badly it hurt. But don't just say 'it hurt so bad' say, 'my flesh grew cold and my soul grew vengeful.' something crazy and descriptive that will catch the readers attention and not let go until a minute after they finish reading the last stanza.

I hope this review helped =] Good luck!



A thing of beauty is a joy forever; its loveliness increases...
— John Keats