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Save Me

by WindSailor


Verse 1:
These waters are rising ever higher
With a force I can't fight 
Now they are slowly taking over 
They are enveloping like the night 

Pre- Chorus: Save me, Save me! 

Chorus: As I fall on my knees 
I remember who has the victory 
As I pray for your peace
I remember who conquered the grave
And I know that you will save me 

Verse 2: 
Now I am tired and I need rest
From this feeling of being oppressed 
As I'm calling out to you
Relieve me of my distress 

Back to Chorus 

Bridge: 
Show me that you have a plan 
And that i can rest in your hands 
Save me from this place 
Deliver me into your grace (x2)


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556 Reviews


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Sun Jul 27, 2014 1:07 am
erilea says...



Great! However, an error.
Here, I think there should be a subject.

"They are enveloping like the night"

How about "me" after "enveloping"?

That will be all. I just might mention one question, which team are you on? Or none at all? Answer me! Happy Review Day!




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Sun Jun 30, 2013 4:07 pm
ArcticMonkey wrote a review...



Hsarver! I have returned to review some of your lyrics x3

Okay, so what I really liked about this was I guess the message and the religious links. I thought it was pretty powerful, leaving a strong message. It's the sort of message that stays with you after a while, and this is really effective. Also, for a song, I quite enjoyed your structure and can imagine it being sung. The bridge is absolutely fantastic, in my opinion, and this message. I'm not sure if this is what you were going for, but it's a sin to commit suicide, so I thought this was rather clever.

Now, I'd really love to see more imagery here! I think I mentioned this in some other lyrics of yours that using more imagery would be great. With a topic like this, I think more description is really needed so the readers/listeners can just picture things really. It would also help to bring up your already strong message to an even better level!

Chorus: As I fall on my knees
I remember who has the victory

These are good lines for your chorus, however when read aloud it seems the rhyming is a bit forced! Maybe you could do a syllable count to watch out for this, because this is your chorus, and you don't want it sounding all dodgy.

Overall, these were some pretty good lyrics. I can tell you're quite talented and have really strong messages to put across, however how you put it across is also key so try using some different techniques! I hope this review helped, PM me with questions or if you'd like anything else to be reviewed.

Keep Lyricing/Writing!
-Arc x




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Sun May 26, 2013 1:00 am
niteowl wrote a review...



Hi HSarver. Niteowl here from the Tsunami Tyrants to review your work again!

Overall, I liked this. It delivers its message and seems like it would flow well. Perhaps not as catchy as the other one of yours I read, but the tune I came up with for that was like "Marvelous Light" level catchy, which is hard to beat.

They are enveloping like the night


This line is a tad awkward. Perhaps "Enveloping me like the night" would flow better.

As I fall on my knees
I remember who has the victory
As I pray for your peace
I remember who conquered the grave
And I know that you will save me


A couple suggestions on the chorus
1) I agree with the previous comment about "achieving victory"
2) Praying for whose peace? I first read this as you praying for God to have peace, which is strange. I think you meant that the speaker is praying to have peace. A small change to "As I pray for some peace" should work
3) The phrase "conquered the grave" brings to mind a very specific song. The one that goes "Savior he can move the mountains...?" I'm guessing you've heard it since it's a worship band favorite. I realize no one owns that phrase, but it might be cool to word the same idea differently to bring something new to the scene.

Now I am tired and I need rest
From this feeling of being oppressed


Not crazy about the word choice here. To me, "oppressed" has a specific connotation about people who don't have the freedom of expression and basic rights that we do. It seems weird to have it in a song like this. Maybe something about being tested by sin/temptation?

Show me that you have a plan
And that i can rest in your hands
Save me from this place
Deliver me into your grace


Capitalize i, otherwise I think it flows well.

Overall, I think this has a solid message and structure. I know I sound a bit harsh sometimes, but my comments are on pretty small stuff that could kick this up a notch. Good job and keep writing! :)




Hsarver says...


Thanks, and no your not being harsh at all. I appreciate honest and helpful criticism, so I can make it better in the future.



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Sat May 25, 2013 11:29 am
TonelessBard wrote a review...



Hey there! You know, I don't usually like religious songs, but this one seems good to me. This is the wonderful picture of having strong faith in something supernatural.

"I remember who has the victory
As I pray for your peace"

I'd like the term "achieved victory" more, but it's your song, depends how it fits in your ear.
Nice piece of art, keep writing ;)

~Bard




Hsarver says...


Thanks, I appreciate your suggestion, I might see if it fits along with the music. :)




I am big enough to admit I am often inspired by myself.
— Leslie Knope