Young Writers Society

The January 2023 Review Day Begins In...

[ Click here for more info ]



That Awkward Moment

by WinnyWriter


That Awkward Moment

That awkward moment . . .

When you were always too young, but now you're too old,

When it's too hot for a jacket, yet still annoyingly cold,

When you want a castle, but you're surrounded by shacks,

When you open your fridge and you're all out of snacks,

When all the cute guys are either jerks or they're taken,

When you show up to class, but you know you're just fakin', 

When you realize we haven't mastered teleportation,

When you don't have enough money for your dream vacation,

When you open your closet and find nothing that matches,

Or all you have clean is something that's itchy and scratches,

When you're forced to remember you can't own a pet dragon,

When you've tried to connect but the WiFi is laggin',

When you're going along and you miss a stair,

When it's been way too long since you last washed your hair,

When someone overhears you sing in the shower,

When you forget to set your clock back an hour,

When you were keeping a secret, but you've gone and blown it,

It makes you cringe - that awkward moment!


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar
515 Reviews


Points: 97
Reviews: 515

Donate
Thu Apr 21, 2022 8:29 pm
View Likes
vampricone6783 wrote a review...



I think this was a cute poem about the little awkward moments in life that happen to all of us.I don’t ever wear matching clothes lol.I like to mix and match.But yeah,most of these are very strange and funny situations to be in.I like the rhythm of this,too.It’s nice.I hope you have an awesome and lovely day and night.




User avatar
12 Reviews


Points: 47
Reviews: 12

Donate
Wed Apr 20, 2022 7:50 pm
View Likes
Hawinay wrote a review...



Hello WinnyWriter, I hope this finds you well.

The rhyming in this poem was downright adorable, and catchy. The repetition goes well with the meaning, awkward moments have no limits in life and sometimes have seconds like a person eating rolls at a dinner table.

If I were to have any sort of critique, it's that instead of;

"Or all you have clean is something that's itchy and scratches,"

you could keep with the repetitive rhythm and say

"WHEN all you have clean is something that's itchy and scratches,".

Overall I believe that is all I have to say for that section. Either way, as I said previously, this was a fun and cute read!

Keep creating beautiful art, and dance in the rain when things seem hard.





here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a treee called life; which grows higher than the soul can home or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)
— e.e. cummings