Dear Marcus, I write to you with great regret,
please, don't make any assumptions just yet!
I've tried so long and I've tried so hard,
but now it's time to end this façade.
You've always been my dearest friend
on whom I know I can depend,
I'd never meant to cause you strife,
but I must inform you- I'm stealing your wife.
Her skin is as smooth as a rose in bloom
and standing by her you look like a prune.
Sunlight streaks through the colour of her hair
but atop your head... well, there isn't much there.
Her irises are coloured like the sea and the sky-
but you're always squinting like there's dust in your eye.
One touch of her lips is like living in bliss,
and you're still the frog that no-one would kiss.
She deserves a life that's lived to the full
but your small talk is bland and your jokes are dull,
she's kind and gentle, like some creature divine,
and you've got a rod up where the sun don't shine.
I'll end this now and spare you the rest,
just try to remember it's all for the best.
Have a good life, I'll see you some day
and I'll pass your regards on to Annie-May.
Fare thee well, I wish you great luck!
Your's sincerely, your good friend Buck.