Young Writers Society

(Quick summary; up until now I've been trying to pretend that my life is still as perfect as it used to be, instead of the mess it has become since my five-year-old cousin Henrietta came into my care. Now the chaos is leaking into my school life too, where my classmates are starting to ask questions.)

‘You look considerably less attractive than usual,’ Simon said when he saw me in school. I didn’t have the energy to fight back. It was first lesson, and I found my eyes falling asleep every time I watched the Second hand on the clock slowly fall from twelve to six - then a painfully slow rise back up to twelve - then another slow decent to six.

‘Who is she?’ Collin asked. He took a seat on the desk, blocking my view of the clock.

‘Who?’

He grinned at me. ‘Leon’s met his match!’ He said, loud enough to catch Amy’s attention.

Amy was a theatre fanatic who had her sights set on the Cavenere Stage since we first played side by side in Snow White, back in Infant School. Her curly red hair had suck out from under Snow White’s black wig, and even though she looked a lot different back then, in the photographs her eyes have the same, pre-emptive spark as they do now.

She looked back from the desk in front that she had been sitting on, then swivelled round to face us.

‘I bet she’s a real firecracker,’ she said in a melodic tone, then crossed one leg over the other and smirked at me, running her fingers along the hem of her inch-too-short skirt. I’ll admit, it was temporarily distracting. It was also done on purpose, it was her way of making fun of me.

‘Does she have a baby?’ said Mira, the girl who’s desk she was sitting on. All three of them looked at her, and when she turned around in her seat. Mira pushed her reading glasses further down her nose to look at me over the thin, purple rims.

‘What?’ I lifted my chin off the table.

‘You walked right past me in the hall on the way here. You reek of baby shampoo.’

All four of them glared at me in accusation.

‘No, no,’ I would have defended myself more enthusiastically, but right then my mind had about as much function as a melted slushie. ‘I’m looking after my cousin for a few days.’ Amy pursed her lips.

‘You know you have to feed it,’ Simon said. ‘And you can’t leave it on its own, yeh?’ I sunk my head down to the desk. ‘Listen, we love you man,’ He stood behind me and tried to squeeze last nights tension from my shoulders.

‘But this right here makes us nervous.’ Collin concluded.

‘How hard could it be?’ Amy asked.

‘Obviously, she doesn’t have siblings.’ Simon said with a hint of bitterness. I wasn’t fully paying attention to the conversation, but rather, relaxing further in what would become a desktop slumber.

‘Yes I do, I’ve got a little sister. She’s going to grow up to be just like me.’ She flicked her hair back and posed in a model-shoot smile.

‘That’s a disaster waiting to happen.’ Collin muttered.

Simon shook his head slowly. ‘Catastrophe.’

‘Oh shut up.’ She scowled and jumped up to return to her seat.

‘Mira,’ I said quietly. ‘Maybe later you could-’

‘Get lost.’

‘He never learns, does he.’ Simon said.

Mira was a girl who took no interest in me. I think I just made comments to tease her sometimes, or purely out of habit. Usually she told me to get lost, but on the days she hated me more than usual she put a little more effort into her insults.

See, I had categories that I put girls into.

Category One: These are the flirts. They are over emotional, overly playful, and very open minded. They don‘t mind short-term or half hearted relationships, and recover quickly when things are over. Amy is a category one girl.

Category Two: Not so fickle as the first category. These girls require some sign of dedication. They’re attracted to the strong, charming man. These girls date for fun, but dare themselves to fall in love. They like to feel like they’re important, like there’s something that makes them different from all the rest, even if they don’t show it.

Category Three: These girls are more dominant. They’re serious about relationships. That’s a good thing, and a bad thing. The good thing is that they’re dedicated, and generally better at staying level headed. They don’t demand attention or intimacy. The bad thing is that as soon as they show traits of Category Four, you’ve got to get out of there. Category Three girls like it when you buy them gifts or take them to special places. They like things that deepen a relationship, even if only on the friendship side of it. Sofia is a Category Three girl.

Category Four: Out of bounds. Category four girls are timid or introverted. They’re attracted to guys they can feel comfortable around, someone they can open up to. Category Four girls take a while to get to know, but once they open up there’s hundreds of interesting things about them. Then when the break-up comes, they act like it doesn’t hurt, but inside they lose a little more of their faith in people.

Category four girls are girls I don’t go near. If I had any kind of conscience, it told me that. Ruth is a Category Four girl.

Mira fits into none of these categories, perhaps that’s what fascinates me about her. At first I put her in Two, but she seems to have no intention of falling in love. Then, Four, but she isn’t withdrawn or shy. She and Amy are as tight as thieves, and she gets along well with the other girls. Mira seems to genuinely have no interest in romance.

Amy said that the reason I like her is because I always want the things I can’t get. It took me a while to understand what she meant by that.

Now, for a quick, serious note: what I said above is a load of rubbish. Girls do not, ever, fit into categories. If you nodded in agreement at any of those points, you should take a long time to think again. Maybe you need a Henri to help you sort you’re your prejudices too.