Don't act like you're perfect when you're comin' to my place
Don't pretend you're not the devil when you ain't a saint
Everyone has their imperfections, stop judging me for my own
Stop judging me for my flaws when you ain't gon' deal with your own
I've done things wrong, this I accept
But I've done things right, when you're angry you don't see this
When you're ticked your vision blurs and you just see me as a blob you can take your anger out on
Or you just ignore me like you ain't gon' bother with me until you think I'm gone
Let's take it back before this all happened
What were we doin' the day before? We were cuttin' up and laughin'
Now I'm the bad guy in your horror story and the only reaction you have is tellin' me off
Now the only thing you gotta say is tellin' me to screw off
What am I supposed to? Wait for you to cool down while you're all spreadin' it
How do you think everyone else feels, you messin' in business that isn't yours
Step out 'fore you get burnt, that's what I have to say
Or come runnin' y'alls mouth to me, I'm here every day
I ain't goin' away
You though? You'll be gone 'fore the clock strikes Six
Ain't a word you can say that'll fix it
I mean watchu expect me to? I'm not all happy and smilin' when you're blowin' up in my face
I'm not sayin' i'm wounded and that i'm the victim no that's not the case
I made a mistake but I'm man enough to face it on my own
I made a mistake but it's not your place to tell it
I made a mistake but you weren't involved so don't rant about it
I hope it's gotten through cause I know I've said it a thousand times already
I know I've repeated it so I should probably stop this
But I ain't ready
Ain't ready to deal with people I know are fake
You think I care if our friendships at stake?
You think I want to deal with someone who has one face today
Teeth baring and fangs tearing
Tomorrow you'll be wearin' a different face, wantin' a favor
My feelin's don't get hurt and I have a five second rebound
One second to cry
One second to hurt
One where I feel like I'm gonna die
two where I plan how you're gonna get burnt
Everything y'all have said, don't think it's gotten to me?
I'm not Superman, I'm not invincible no matter what your heart sees
I'm not batman, all the money in the world couldn't salvage
what's wrong here
All the money in the world couldn't salvage
The tears
that's fallin' today
Put your money where your mouth is and quit goin' behind my back
Wouldn't be personal but you went on the attack
Runnin' yyour mouth is a cryin' shame when you don't know the full details
Step up or shut up, I'll be your living Hell.
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140,210 Literary Works • 673,042 Reviews
Hey, Kazey here for a review day review!
I like the message of the song, its really clear and prevalent throughout, so that's good. I also liked the colloquial language you used throughout; it really fit with the style of the song.
One thing I would say is be careful about flow. You have lots of different line lengths and it makes it quite difficult to read and to envision someone singing it is. Just read through your work aloud and see where changes could be made.
Anyway, happy Review Day!
~Kazey
The thing about the line lengths is that this is rapped, some lines are longer because they're sped up. Thanks for the review!
Ah, I see. That makes sense now.
Hey Matt, Im gonna attempt to help boot all your songs out of the green room tonight (I know it bothers me when i have a work in there for more than a week)
There is a lot of hostility in this song, again Im touching the flow of this mainly because it's got the potential to be a great song, if only the flow to it was smoother. I think I know what this song was written for so I cant really talk much about the message in it. But you do get your point across. Yeah I hate it when people tell others secrets I tell them but I also know that if I talk about their best friends that theyre gonna tell their friends about it too. So i keep that in mind. anyways, this is probably my favorite song to think about in general because of the message in it.
~Mem