I looked like her

Hey there! This is Ina aka loveissourgrapes and I am here to read your lovely poem. Sorry if there might be typos because I am typing this review/comment on my phone. And I am also here for the angst and the darker poems of @alpacaboss. It is good that you are experimenting with your writing skills with different genres. Now for the main review!

First impressions. I finally get to read your mystery/suspense writing of yours since you said you were nervous about this to reassure you, it is good for a first-time writer of mystery/suspense poems. I am not yet going to post mine because it's not very much polished well. Maybe it might take me years. This poem also reminds me of those thoughts in the middle of the night in the shower. That's why I don't look in the mirror. Because I could be scared of my reflection.

The descriptions of your wet hair in front of the mirror give off that scary vibe of your reflection. Starting at your own eyes, you could be scared because you don't know your true form, your true self. Those angry eyes, and your bare body having wounds because your hands are claws. The mentions of memories, like you want to be a better person even in those old memories. Your own reflections is like a monster that you want to kill yourself but she takes control over you and influences you to do bad things.

I hope you are okay because having thoughts like this might be very hard to get rid off especially if you are a ypung teenager or a preteen. Overall, writing-wise, it is great. Okay, gotta go out now because Dad is calling. Have a nice day/night! c:

Heyo, alpaca!
You certainly weren't wrong when you said you were going through a dark writing phase! But don't worry. I'm not judging you. I LOOOOVVVVEEE dark writing when it has at least some control which I believe you have. The very thing I am writing has a bit of this kind of stuff in it.

I can't criticize you're work here: its too relatable and intense. So, all I've got are compliments.

Usually when I read poetry, I struggle with understanding it. But this was so well written that I could sit back and forget I was reading a poem. All I had to do was read a line and a mental image instantly popped into my mind. I don't really know how you do it. It's really admirable. You tell a whole story here and you dont even use a complete sentence! You've certainly got some magic under the keys you type with.

You also definately have a way of making the reader instantly sympathize with the character. You make the reader just want to step into the poem and tell her how beautiful she truly is. Poor girl.

Here's my one critique: Put this under a 12+ or 16+ tag!! I guess it's kinda my personal opinion here, but the rules say to put serious stuff under a 12+ tag, and this is definately on the darker side of things.

Okay, that's it! Hope you have an excellent day!
-Kaia

Howdy hey! Gengar here to leave a review!

I feel as if this poem could be interpreted in two ways:

1.) The speaker has done things in the past that they try to hide. Their past self is the “her” that they try to scratch out, to get rid of, but it is no use because they end up scarred.
2.) The speaker looks like someone who has done horrible things (I assume their mother), and vows to never be like her (“ I swore never to be like her / To imitate any part of her /But if my face was like her /I cannot get rid of her.”)

I like the imagery you’ve used, especially in the descriptions of the wet hair and the claws.

I found myself staring

At unrelenting eyes

Intense, fierce, angry

And overly tired eyes.

*

Time stood still

It was me, myself, and I

Vulnerable, unclothed

Meeting eye to eye.