The reasons there are to love someone
There are so many reasons to love someone, we don’t usually see the real truth behind our relationships between friends, romantic partners or family love. I think it’s important to really take an insight into the reasons as to why we love someone in order for healthier and happier lifestyles. If you find no reason why you love someone early on then it is an early indicator of toxic collaborations between human beings, if you see what I mean. I have different types of love for different people depending on our environments and needs between them and I.
First of all, we have family love. Most often between relatives however adults that have been friends since a young age can feel almost like they are relatives ; and with that comes the love we commonly see within families.
Just think, if you and your mum had a bad argument and someone walked out the house, one of you would return and things would become close to normal again in a day or 2 (sometimes longer).
If a friend were to say the same things that your family member said, it is a possibility that the friendship would end straight away. Family love is long-lasting and difficult to leave from generally due to life just ‘being that way’ I guess.
I think that is why it is so difficult for people to leave toxic households, because everyone has fights with their parents, everyone has an occasional falling out with siblings.
The next type of love has to be romanticized love. The love for your partner is different to the love you have for friends and family ect in many ways. The love you have because you can’t imagine a future without simply ‘loving’ them. There isn’t really a way to describe it as every couple goes about their relationship differently.
There needs to be unlimited trust and selflessness to make the classic duo work well ; obviously there also needs to be elements like humor or hobbies in the mix, however trust is the one thing that is required in a romantic relationship or you risk the mentally draining impact of heartbreak.
Friendship. Do I really need to explain love in friendship… Yeh it isn’t lovey-dovey like the more romanticized love, but you still become attached to people. Friendship needs so many elements to be healthy for all sides of it such as: trust, supporting, honesty, respect, consent, responsibility and forgiving. Every true friend will have arguments from time to time, however with these attributes it can heal sometimes quicker than family issues just because of how stupid and small the actual problem is.
I myself find friendship the most powerful and important out of every single type of love just because of the results...there isn’t pressure or needing constant romantic elements, just a few insults, words of encouragement, honest answers and wholesome love for eachother and I, myself is good. I also find that friendship can be easy to find and start. Even though good friends can be hard to find, it is pretty easy to begin a conversation and get to know someone. Then it can evolve to something so much more.
Another important type of love is admiration. Have you ever had a crush on someone without even knowing them? If you said no then you have to be lying, everyone has had a celebrity crush at one point or another. You haven’t ever personally known a celeb but you picture what they are like, or simply judge from awards and their standard of living they say they hold (apparently).
Or maybe you know someone - not related - and simply look up to them in admiration and love for their personality and achievements. Yes you can look up to your grandparents or family members, but that blends more into family love if you see where I’m coming from. This could be your doctor/nurse, therapist, councilor, teacher, actor, singer, impersonator, just about anyone in our world can be looked up to for a number of reasons.
The last type of love is SELF LOVE… we as a society need to step up in this aspect. Being averagely confident can seem insecure whereas having a good mindset and love for yourself seems braggy, boasty or even cocky. I would give anything in the world to love myself more, and I am sure you could give yourself a self care night every once in a while. We face stress, pressure, weaknesses, failures and troubles ; this causes us to blame ourselves for things natural as the human race, but when did you give your mind a rest from the negativity, treated yourself to a cheeky bar of chocolate (not sharing obvs) or a hot, long bath oh yeh with that bath bomb you haven’t had the time to use -_-
What love is most important to you and what do you think we as a society need to focus on more?