z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

To the one who stole my heart

by YourFriendQuirks08


I don’t know what draws me to your presence

But I have always had a space in my heart

For you, and you only...my dearest

You are the light within the darkest nights

That fills me with brightness

However without you

The clouds start to darken

They coat the light thickly

Until it’s another dark day

Of a cruel world

I am trapped inside

Within a small walkway of Oxford close

Near to your last sighting

Before you left without a trace

The space in my heart is urging

Urging for you to come visit home

And to rock me to sleep once again

------

You have haunted my thoughts for months on end

The abstract pain won’t leave my mind

My sane head is turning psycho

I need your love

I would die for you to appear in my dreams once again

In this cold, wicked twilight

On a midsummer night

I just need you to come home

Home...wherever that may be

Just come

Come to me and save me once again

From these horribly chilling emotions

They take over me

Slow as a sinking Manatee

Yet cruelly as a burning flame

On a suffering cross

------

I must have a bit of your time

1 minute with you

is 1 less line on my wrist

2 minutes with you

Are 2 more smiles

3 minutes with you

Are 3 wishes of hope

4 minutes with you

Are 4 more places we can travel

In our minds

Where we are also together

In a world just for us

We are whole

--------

All I need is your appearance

In my mind

To make me smile

...not fake...for once

Your voice

In my mind

Makes me feel loved

Truly

In a world of lies and untrusting friendships

Our future can never meet each other

But I shall love and trust you with all my heart

And will look down upon you from god’s clouds

Up in heaven

-------

We can only have a small relationship

However small can be so much more

If we work through our struggles

And face it together

------

You will never share your thoughts with me

Never trust me like I do when I am around you

But I will always be here

Be there

When you need someone the most

Whether you want it or not,

I can sense your emotions

Panic, stress, sadness

Joy, gratitude, pride

And I will always be a shoulder

When your in need of a person

There to speak whatever is on your mind

--------

Because I love you

I adore you

I will support you

And thank you

Until our last sunset together comes

Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments


User avatar
78 Reviews

Points: 40
Reviews: 78

Donate
Sat May 01, 2021 3:05 am
View Likes
NivedaJames22 wrote a review...



Hey!

First of all, lemme just say you have done an awesome job with this poem.

You have a captivating title, that is both intriguing and touching.

I liked how you describe this person as the light that brightens your darkest nights.

These lines are really good:

In this cold, wicked twilight

On a midsummer night

I just need you to come home


I'm not sure if this is what you meant, but I feel like this person is the only thing that could warm you during the cold chill of that cruel midsummer's night.

This part was really beautiful:

I must have a bit of your time

1 minute with you

is 1 less line on my wrist

2 minutes with you

Are 2 more smiles

3 minutes with you

Are 3 wishes of hope

4 minutes with you

Are 4 more places we can travel

In our minds



I like how you ended on a hopeful note, by implying that you have a last sunset yet to come.

I also like how you are ambiguous about the nature of your relationship with this person. I think that makes it more relatable to a reader.

On the whole, it is a beautiful poem.

Keep writing.






Heya, thank you so much for your review, I really appreciate the time taken to write this.
I was just writing this to express my feelings and I decided to upload it (i do my work on google docs). Your assumptions would be quite right also!

Thanks for reviewing and reading,
Love Rubes :)



Random avatar

Points: 137
Reviews: 6

Donate
Fri Apr 30, 2021 1:28 am
View Likes
MannyPLator wrote a review...



I can feel the pain in your words, hang in there, at some point people like us will finally get the love that we deserve. You have real talent, and I know that no matter what anybody says you cannot make the pain go away. Keep writing, it's the only way you can release yourself from this fake world. We create our own world because it is much easier than this....this goddamn fakeness that surrounds us at every point. And even if she/he does not come back, you will still have your mind, and at times it is truly hard, you feel like there is no point in going on, but life is so beautiful, and your mind is beautiful, just hold on tight. Without darkness there can be no light.






Your words are so encouraging, thank you loads! I've just been needing her at the moment and she has been there for me this whole time, she just can't do much that's really legal...I saw her yesterday and had a chat with her about things. Safe to say I honestly have this wholesome love about her.
Stay safe

Love Rubes




As a former (and rather excellent) liar herself, Aru knew that, sometimes, speaking the truth felt like wrenching a thorn out of your side. But doing the opposite meant pretending it wasn't there. And that made every single step ache. It was no way to live.
— Roshani Chokshi, Aru Shah and the Nectar of Immortality