GIRLLLLL!!!!! DO YOU ACTUALLY NOT REALISE
HOW COOL THAT DISCOVERY IS??? Knowing
You, the rest of your team is probably
Very high and full on celebrations and
You are just writing down the article
To be published at this very moment.
Sounds like you need some space from your work.
And to be honest, so do I.
Just came back from ALMA so
That I could deal with my foe:
Myself and my eternal thirst
To criticise my own self first
And strive for perfection
In a world of contradictions,
Despite knowing its futility
And man's limited capability.
So, here I am looking into emission
Lines and redshifts and such of Type-I
And Type-II AGNs like of calcium,
Magnesium, hydrogen and helium,
To know more about a weird thing
Called dark matter, it's fascinating --
I just discovered more about it but it's not that fun,
As there's always new stuff 'bout it under the sun
But hey, love, space is fun and all
But I am sad that you forgot to call
And tell me more about your day like you
Like to do -- I really missed your voice, my boo.
Well, I guess, we're not so different after all then.
You deal with buried bones, and I run
My code to deal with calcium emission
Lines. You dig up organic-rich strata
While I deal with carbon redshift data.
It's all the same stuff, only sextillions
Of kilometres and galactic evolution
Separate it -- while we are just two dots
In Chile and South Africa dealt with lots
That separate us for just 30 days --
And half of that, we've already faced.
Be strong, my girl. No matter what, I'm here for you,
"In prosperity and in adversity," I swore in the pew.
You must know, my love, even if death does us apart --
In each and every timeline, you shall stay in my heart.
Points:
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IP address:
Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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140,083 Literary Works • 672,994 Reviews
This gets to be a review, yay! Hey Rebel, this is Alex, at it again. Let's dive right in, shall we?
Their difference of perspectives is such a treat like always! The fact that Lavender is depressed on the detail of King Shaka being buried in a grain pit, but Jasmine celebrates that her partner discovered a lost grave despite the sheer difficulty of the task- I just love idea to use the contrast of thoughts to portray opposite personalities.
Ah, I was so close!! No worries though, for it really does make sense. I'm still not so sure if King Shaka's story was fit to be linked to this puzzle so closely, both the themes barely coincidence well for it.
Jasmine is so open about her struggles, I love it for her! Plus it makes total sense for her character, as opposed to Lavender who likes to keep her demons to herself.
So very philosophical and true! The rhymes also work beautifully, everything's perfect.
Jasmine makes it sound like they're such small particles in the endless space, and I find it a clever fit for the title here. I actually forgot ALMA is in Chile midway in the poem and I guess King Shaka was just an excuse to get Lavendar to Africa and link it to her job- all to portray their separate. Certainly elaborate thinking on your end, and I have nothing against it. And they're going to be away for the entirety of the series ahhh, that's a little heartbreaking. It would've been nice to read a poem of them after meeting but I guess it wouldn't really make sense in reality.
I think I understand the prospect of this series a lot better- they've been apart all this while and these poems are their letters conversing with each other. First they try to keep it run and light with riddles to distract how much they miss each other, but we see the story bleed into their poems more and more as time progresses and don't want to hold back showing their true emotions anymore. It's such a real concept, bravo!
Jasmine always knows what to say, love the ending!!
I do have a slight nitpick that the narrative seems to getting a too literal and specific with its knowledge more recently. It's good that you're showing their careers so thoroughly, but it makes the reader struggle to keep up as they might not share the same level of intellect as you do. I hope it gets toned just slightly moving forwards, and it'd make following and enjoying things more easier.
That's all I have for now, hope I've been helpful! Until next time ~
Love, Alex
Hey there, Alex, thanks a lot for the review!
About specific and literal references, except for some Shakespearean references and pop music, I don’t think there's any science-related references after this.
Also, hey, you might get a pleasant surprise towards the end of the series!
Thanks for the high praise, Alex! 😁
For some, even redshifts, emission lines and ALMA can be much, my friend XD
I mean, google exists
At first I was wondering if the first stanza was referring to the last poem. But I guess this is plot happening in the background and Jasmine is just really committed to the poetry and I love it. I love how it fits so well with established characters and also how you managed to give us more info on while still adhering to your rules. And keeping their respective poetry styles consistent!
Also nice to know that they exchange these poems in addition to actually talking to each other and here Jasmine is worried because Lavender missed their calls. (I also adore how the science fits into this. It shouldn't work as well as it does!)
But now I still don't know the answer to the riddle. I blame the cold!
I really really like this poem :3
Thanks for the review, Tikaya! And oh well, if I were a Field Wielder, I would instantly cure you right now -- but alas, I can only hope that you get well soon. *Hands over virtual flowers with a "Get well soon!" card*
Also, the answer is the only italicised word in the poem, it's there in the line right after the first stanza~~
I honestly don't think I've seen anyone ever write poetry like this. It's amazing! I had to read it a few times because I was so amazed. These are the kinds of writers that change the world.
Aw, thanks for those sweet comments, Kitty! :p