Who's your beloved Neo-Latinist archaeologist?
Who's your favourite person whom you really miss?
Who's over Ryukyu right now and badly needs a kiss?
Who's your first date and now your final tryst?
I am so tired of replying to comments and questions and
Responses and critiques and hundreds of thousands
Of people clamouring to me for details, some are my friends
And colleagues, while others spew slurs and hate to no end.
But, oh well, that's part of the package, I guess.
And, oh well, I have you with me to deal with a mess
Like me, to love me, to listen to my rants and play chess.
I am not even in my 40s and I want to retire just to destress.
"Now you won't be an ocean away, you will only be a moment away!"
Thoughts of work subside as I read another poem, and I put the notion away.
There's a lake by our home where we can write poems and spend our day,
We will kiss under the sakura, look up at the stars, as April turns to May.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
Hiya Rebel, let's get into it ~
I love how much more effortlessly her poetry flows now! I thought leaving verse was going to be more of a permanent change but oh well, no harm because I really liked this. Also, sweet spot for the poem because the answer is fairly obvious but in a good way, you want the reader to guess beforehand and go 'aww' over it, afterall.
My favourite lines, they're so adorable and sweet ahhhhh
Yes, love is all about lending and accepting your partner's support in tough times! I feel like Lavender is being visibly more mature towards life now.
These rhymes might've been a little difficult, but it makes sense that things won't change in a jiffy. It's realistic and at least Lavender looks a lot more free in her expression- that's what actually matters. Also, moving just to before want makes it easier to read in continuity, so you might want to rethink that one.
The ending, though not your best, was extremely beautiful <3
That's all I have for now, until next time ~
Love, Alex
I already know the answer from the next poem's title but I also think Lavender's not being all that subtle XD
Ryuku is a location? So Lavender's on the plane and still waxing poetically at her gf. So typical <3
I also like that the attention she gets is not wholy positiv but it's not the presence of the negative comments that makes this so exhausting, it's the overwhelming amount. You can clearly see that this girl just wants to hole up at home and not see the world for a bit.
Oh and I like the acknowledgement that they do read each other's poems and find comfort in them. I mean, it was obvious from the start, since they've been reacting to each other but it's nice that she's explicitly stating it here!
And I like that the poem ends on "as April turns to May" :3
Ryukyu islands is an archipelago in the southwest of mainland Japan, extending from Kyushu to Taiwan. Lavender's going from South Africa to Japan, so Ryukyu islands is the final stretch of the plane's journey!
"You can clearly see that this girl just wants to hole up at home and not see the world for a bit."
Yeah exactly lol, and I can't even blame her. And yes, every poem in the collection is written on the same day it was posted here. "April turns to May" is an indication of Spring turning to Summer, which is foreshadowing the following poems too!
Thanks again for reading! :p