I can’t decide this fate,
For me to stay or go away,
Knowing my depression is getting worse,
Nothing seems to help…
Doing my writing, something I truly enjoy,
It doesn’t make me smile no more,
No matter how much I smile,
I cry on the inside, feeling the pain every waking moment.
So I ask you, is this truly goodbye?
Or some feeling in my heart that wants me to feel like thisis goodbye?
I ask you,
What can I do to remove this pain?
To forget the worries and sadness,
That wallows in my heart.
I need to know for sure, is this truly goodbye?
To the site where I have met wonderful writers?
Where I made good friends?
Young Writers Society, please tell me…
Is this truly my end? Or just some feeling that needs to goaway?
I ask you,
What can I do… to be happy once again?
Is this truly… the end? Or a new beginning?
Is this truly goodbye?
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
139,877 Literary Works • 672,783 Reviews
Hi it's me teacake013 here to review.
I thoroughly and truthfully enjoy your work it was unique!:)
I'm not here to judge your work, so I'll tell you
I know it takes a lot to publish you're works so I respect that completely even if it is about the site itself
It was different to say the least.
But there was a few mistake here and there.
But many have told you those already so I skip over that to say.
It's well done and spacing is great and hopefully I'll review another work of yours another time in the near future.
Hope you keep on improving and writing you're heart out!.!
Love, Teacake013
Even though this poem is about the site I still feel the need to review it, because you made a few mistakes.
First of all: "It doesn't make me smile no more." Proper grammar just makes a poem look better. And "Or just some feeling that needs to go away" You made a bit of a careless mistake and combined these two words.
Good notes: You had great spacing and nice punctuation and capitalization. Well done ^.^
Well it's ultimately your decision, but I hope you stay I enjoy your writing. Depression is something so few truly understand, and even fewer can truly cope with. Most assume it's just an illness that needs medicine, because ignorance is bliss and the ones who believe it can be cured with medicine are ignorant. Life is but a fleeting dream, you either get swept in the tide, or fight through it forging your own path.
I for one would miss you.
Your a really good writer! im new here and haven't done any thing much on here, but i really like what you have been writing. Don't leave!
That teddy bear gif is adorable.
thanks haha
Hey.
But whatever, I liked it, but it changed patterns almost suddenly, the emotion just went haywire. Like, it didn't have a proper flow. Or maybe you wanted to make it this way.
I'm I actually reviewing this? You left me confused lol, and you forgot spaces twice.
And please elaborate on what do you mean here? xD
Good one though.
Keep writing and stay blessed.
xoxo
To be honest, this is how I truly feel... I don't know if I am staying on YWS or not..
Oh don't leave
We need good writers, and YWS improves us too