The Dining Table

Hi, this is ZeldaIsShiek, here to review another amazing piece of poetry and beat the Werewolves once and for all! For the Witches shall win in the end! But before that happens, I am going to help you improve your writing as a whole and improve you as a Young Writer in the process. Of this I am certain. Are you ready? Let's begin the review!

You are one of my favorite poets and writers in general on all of Young Writer's Society, and I feel that this poem did not subtract from the large amount of credit I give you for the work that you write. At first I was not sure the connection between a dining table and someone leaving, until I realized that the person leaving left an empty seat at the dining table. That is what this whole poem is about! That is why it is so important to me now. This poem is about you wondering why your family member had to leave you, and they left an empty seat at the dinner table as a constant reminder of the fact that they were no longer a part of your life. This sad story is a part of many families, and it is something that has happened to many people. Fortunately, my parents divorced when I was very young and didn't know what was going on, so I never had to deal with the immediate sadness and the realization that someone you love has left you. That's all for this review on your amazing work. Happy Review Day!

-ZeldaIsShiek

Hello, E.E here for a possibly quick review and maybe some utter nonsense! Grim is here as well, drinking hot cocoa and being a slacker. *Grim looks over, glaring* So, lets get started.

So, first thing I notice is that a lot of places are missing commas and things alike. It may be your style to not include them but just in case, I will list them for you.

1. "So you left" A comma is needed after the word "So" and after "Left"

2. "So you left us" Once again, after the word "So" and after the word "us"

3. "The lights went out" Joins the Comma Club as well.

4. "Why did you leave us" Another member joins the club!

5. "The campus was quiet" OMG Becky, another member!

6. "The campus was quiet" Again.

7. "Your face was shrouded" You should know by now, seriously.

8. "You have left us" You really, really should know by now.

Otherwise I did not notice any more grammar or spelling mistakes, so good job. The flow was pretty good to.

Now is when I dissect your poem and see if I can't get its meaning right! So, in your poem you are telling us, the reader, about how nights usual go at the dinning table. how the same people fight, the same food wasted and the same person always yells, always leave the rest in silence. You wait for the person to return on night, to talk but they don't and it all hurts, no?

Hey there, Ishan212. This was a really sweet tribute.
I feel like the people left behind just weren't ready for his parting (no one ever is) and they're having trouble adjusting to his absence. The chair is still there, waiting, and it feels to the people that even the house and the earth misses his presence. There's two lines: No one was at home. To take care of you as all the trees were grown. This makes me think the people left behind feel guilty, am I right? Anyway, from this poem, I get the feeling he was a bright, loud man who brought an air of happiness to the house. That all went away when he died, but I hope those left behind can find a way to see that happiness again through the memories they still have.

Just one spelling error I found: The campus was quite. I think you mean 'quiet' as in 'no sound'.

I've heard grief expressed in a lot of ways and this poem is really original. There is always an empty space when you've lost someone you love, but I've never imagined the other people at the table. It was new and special. I like the lines about the birthday and the cake because it shows how the world has lost something. There is a hole.
I wish I could just keep saying all the amazing things I got from reading this poem, but unfortunately this is a review and reviews include some harsh things sometimes that are really needed for a writer's development. you misspelled the word "quiet" 3 times, and after the 3rd I just got really distracted by it and it was harder to find meaning in the poem. I would also like to have some hints about why everyone is at fault. It would make the poem deeper and more relatable to people.

Hey there! Shey here for a quick review!

Overall, this was an enjoyable piece. It was powerful, and resonated within me. I can't personally relate to this work (fortunately), but that doesn't stop me from enjoying it nonetheless.

My first comment is something I normally would not mention. I don't often bring up grammatical errors because the point of a review is to improve the writer, not the work. The correction of a typo makes the piece better, but doesn't aid the writer in any way. However, I'm doing it in this special case because of a misspelling in something which is repeated for effect. You spelled what I believe was supposed to be "quiet" as "quite". It was said three times, and so it was meant to have an effect on the reader. Thus, I felt the need to mention it.

This work has a beautiful meaning, and a beautiful delivery. For the most part, I don't have many things to complain about. So, now I suggest you try to bring some formatting into your work. Take advantage of whitespace. Indent lines that are more important, align some words and phrases to really emphasize them. You could also split your poem into stanzas, but that's more for organization and visual, not really to improve the reading of the work.

All in all, great job! Keep up the great work, cause I look forward to seeing more from you!