When I was a child,
I wanted to learn the work.
I asked her to let me learn the work
She didn't allow me.
She told, “ You can't”
When I am grown up
I don't want to learn the work.
I told her, “ I don't want to.”
She insisted.
She said, “ You have to.”
Why should this continue?
I child who wants to
Isn't allowed to.
A person who doesn't want
Is forced to.
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Canary word: Present
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139,896 Literary Works • 672,725 Reviews
Okay I really liked this for a couple reasons. one being it was short but I really think it told a story that was sadly true because I think people who can tell things in short are so talented because here I am taking five hours to get my thought down only to no longer have a short story so I really aplaude this. another thing I liked was the message of course because it was true cause no matter what people always want more or to question us. Anyway in short I really liked the poem and I encourage you to keep writing. have a great rest of you day!
-sunflower demon
Thanks for your wonderful review
I actually really enjoyed this poetry and the bittersweet kind of representation you were going for there. This is well thought out and composed, and your rhyming structure was great.
My only critique is
'I child who wants to' could be I a child who wants to
'A person who doesn't want' could be a person who doesn't want to
But other than that, great job
I enjoyed reading this poem
Thanks