Hi Forever! I'm here for your RevMo Banner Contest prize reviews - I'm so sorry for the delay! Thank you for your patience!
So right off the bat, the title of this poem is a really interesting and engaging question. It takes a fairly common idea - what even is the point of crying if it doesn't fix anything? - and puts a very original and interesting spin on that. I've never thought of tears as being a currency or having a cost, and I think it's a very cool idea!
My first impression, after one read, is that there's an interesting contrast between very formal language (acceptable, watercourse, infinitude) and then much more personal phrases like "Great- great" and "definitely". I think this has the potential to create a neat development in tone as the poem progresses, but right now it feels a bit inconsistent because the tone just kind of jumps back and forth, rather than starting as one and gradually changing into the other. If you were interested in playing around with that, I think it would be very cool if the poem started out as stiff sounding with very formal language, and then by the end of the poem had broken down into personal and relaxed language. It does that a bit towards the end, with fairly conversational language in the last three lines:
In today's world,
These tears are costless
Crying is worthless
and if that progression was accentuated even more, I think it would create a more complex emotional journey for the reader!
In terms of one very small nitpick -> the opening sentence, up to "But is there any such place?" is very long and a bit hard to follow, and I think breaking it down into two or three sentences would make it feel a lot smoother!
I do love how consistent your imagery is throughout - and water imagery at that! My fave type of imagery :3 Using descriptions that contain words like tears, watercourse, water, and crying, keeps the entire poem connected as a single unit. Honestly "Crying is worthless" is such a heartbreaking </3 way to end the poem and definitely very poignant, too! And I noticed a sneaky bit of rhyming here:
It should be dealt
Whose importance should be felt
which is a lovely touch c:
Overall, I had a lot of fun reviewing one of your older poems, and I can definitely see that you've grown a lot as a poet while also keeping a recognizable poetic voice! I hope this review proves useful for you; if you have any questions or thoughts abut stuff I mentioned, don't hesitate to bring them up.
Keep writing!
-Seirre
Points: 21923
Reviews: 455
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