Young Writers Society

Hellooo there Mika here for a quick review/comment!

I really enjoyed reading this, full of imagination and emotion! At first, I thought the Ice cream was happy that there was no spoon to finish it up, but nearing the end, it seemed as if the ice cream wanted to be eaten. As if melting was like suffering, and it wanted to stop it and get finished. As if melting was like being useless, disappearing in the most slow, useless way possible. While reading, I was wondering, why was the ice cream filled with remorse and not feeling fit in this world? perhaps it was not contributing to its owner, not allowing it to eat it? I wasn't sure, and maybe my interpretations are silly, but that's who i am!;) I tend to think the weirdest in everything. Anyways. I love how you made certain words rhyme, it was really pleasant to read aloud! Also what drew me to first read this poem was the title! I was feeling hungry, and I missed eating Ice cream, so...i just looove eating the creamy, tasty dessert! I really liked reading this, awesome poem, keep it up! I mean, you already are, but still!


have a good day/night/afternoon/evening etc. etc.

Love this poem, it conveys a lot of feeling and doesn't beat around the bush in a short time frame. I actually felt bad for the melting ice cream as its own owner wonders how to eat it. Seriously won't someone give this poor ice cream a spoon so it could be eaten?

Goodnight and good morning, RokitaVivi.

Greetings!

Such a short poem conveys such deep feeling. It has many meanings. But I think anyone can relate to at some point in their lives feeling like they're a melting ice cream no one wants.

The first impression I got was that the melting ice-cream without a spoon is a metaphor for a person without someone to love them. At first, the person felt okay being on their own (without a spoon), but then, they started to feel lonely and gradually melted into helplessness. Maybe it's just me getting that impression.

But, then I noticed that you capitalized "He." Now, perhaps this is also a wrong impression, but this led me to think that you're referring to God. So, then I thought that maybe the "I" in the poem is thinking he/she is worthless because he/she is lacking something (ie the spoon) but he/she realizes at the end that he/she still important because his/her owner is God and He still loves His creation. I like this meaning more. Just because one person has one thing that another doesn't (ie a spoon), doesn't mean that the one person is better or more useful than another. Everyone struggles with that. Everyone wants another person's talents or another person's looks etc. etc. etc. But, again, even without those things, one is still important and will be used (or eaten )

But, as I said in the beginning, I think that this poem can be taken several ways. But the general theme I got was "helpless but still loved."

Thought you might find my interpretations interesting...

Happy writing and hope you have a better day soon, my dear icecream,
Kaia

I really like this poem! I am a lil too sick to write a review, but this poem is short and sweet and conveys a strong message. Nice work!

Hi @ForeverYoung299

I loved your poem very much, I must say you really put some effort in it. I like the fact that it's about ice cream, (one of the main reasons I chose to read it), it's so sweet and yet so creamy and fluffy with those sprinkles on top sometime. It's seems like such an ordinary thing, but you've really transformed it into something extraordinary.

The first sentence is so great! Very nice start of I would say.
"I am a cup ice cream without a spoon,"

"A long ago"

I usually would expect something like, A long "time" ago, but this is also fine. It's different, 'cause I've never read something like that before, but I <3 it.

"I thought it to be a boon."

Well, that's funny.

"For not a single person could eat me,
I was completely free and full of glee!"

I can feel the excitement in there. He/She is so happy for he is free and completely the boos of it's own. You did a great job showing the feelings and bringing out the emotions that are playing out there.

"But now as I am slowly melting down,
I am full of remorse, I can only frown,
There is really nothing I can do about it,
For this useful world, I am not at all fit."

I love the rhyming very much over here. "Down" with "frown" and "it" with "fit". It's so adorable and sweet, but the message is a bit sad. The fact that he thinks he's not good enough for the world is just sad. He doesn't fit in, he thinks. Let me tell you something, you are not the problem,

"the he problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. Do you understand?" - POTC quotes

I like that one very much, because it makes you reflect on yourself.

Anywho let's continue...

"My owner stares at my cup and me and asks, "How will I eat thee?" Someday, He will perhaps eat me, No matter how useless I may be."

This is very intense and paints and vivid image in my head. Great job over there! The last line will probably stick in my head forever, (my favorite line)

Overall, I think this poem was very strong and powerful. Even though it was short it brought over a meaningful message and I loved it very much.

Keep up the amazing work! Enjoy your day!

I'll surely read more of your work soon!

- Rinisha