Young Writers Society

Hello,
this poem is great. You did a great job at using imagery to help the reader feel like they were lost at sea. You also did a great job finding perfect rhyming words. I always have trouble finding good rhymes, it's really hard. You have a true talent!
I also like how you spaced out the world drifting at the end of the poem, like the words are drifting away and also becoming lost at sea.

this is a great poem
keep writing!
-Ang920

Hi,
Great poem, I love you're play on letters and it gave me a great image in my head. It says a lot about just letting lose and letting go (my interoperation).
The title didn't really speak to me in the sense of 'yes lets read this', but the simplicity is so nice and quit peaceful.
Keep up the good work! I would like to read something from you again.

Hey Aley!
This poem was beautiful! I really enjoyed the visual it gave me of the ocean. The flow was really great and it kept me reading! The only thing I would say is change the title to something that will make others want to read it. Maybe capitalize like Arzoo said. Or change it so something more interesting. Something that will catch people's attention. Other than that your poem was wonderfully written! Keep up the magnificent work and I hope to read more of your work in the future!
AshleyDashley

Greetings, Aley!

I'll try to give the best possible review. Here we start:

TITLE:
Title is something which should be as far as possible, CAPTIVATING. Personally, I didn't find anything interesting about it. I only came here for the reason being I like Nature poems. To attract more readers, use title that capture attention.

RHYMING SCHEME & CAPITALIZATION SCHEME:
Well, yeah hats-off to your rhymes... The flow with which you have written is splendid. Imagery has been well portrayed through words. I could easily visualize the beautiful scene. Also, I like the Old and Contemporary Capitalization scheme used here.

ENDING:
Unlike others, your ending wasn't abrupt at all. Till the end, you kept me intact with the scenes. The last part is SIMPLY AMAZING. Something, which isn't easily found.

SO yeah, overall it was mesmerizing! If possible, go for a better title. Nothing else do I feel like criticising about.
I too have written something on nature. You could read and review it here if possible: Seaside Serenity

Keep writing! Good luck!
-Arzoo!

Hi there!
Alright, so to start off, I've been sucked out to sea by a rip current twice before! I related to this far more than I thought I would when I first clicked on your poem. xDDD Both times my aunt got me out, but the second was somehow MORE terrifying because I was much older and still frustratingly helpless. So with that said, this poem gave the the good AND bad sorts of chills, and I really connect with the broken phrases and words.
I really love your word choices in general, luv. Breaking the surface for air is a bittersweet moment when you're simply sucked down again. It's bright, blinding, and longed-for.
I also enjoyed your broken-up "drifting", because it really portrays your loss of focus on the world around you, and on your own body. It's easy to get lost when you run out of oxygen, which brings me to the last line!
I LOVE the finality of it; it really ties it together, and gives the whole thing a deep (no pun intended) meaning and wraps up the work splendidly.
Overall, you did a wonderful job with it! I do poetry injustice, so I always admire those who execute it well!
Also, as a side note, I didn't find anything to really critique... I did try! I just couldn't find anything XD
Happy writing!!!