Just friends

by kris

Published September 29, 2008

In Poetry

why do people think that caring -
is a way of making ends?

What's wrong with sharing kindness?
Whats wrong with being friends?

I admit that your good-looking,
I concede you have your charms.

But I've never yet dreamt
of being in your arms.

Comments & reviews · 6
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Chirantha
Review
Chirantha wrote a review Review · Oct 2, 2008

Wow, I liked it. As everyone says, it was short, sweet and straight to the point. And the poem being shorter has it's advantages, like not making the reader bored and having the reader remember the meaning of the poem.

why do people think that caring - (Captilize the 'W')
is a way of making ends?

What's wrong with sharing kindness?
Whats wrong with being friends?

I admit that your good-looking, (It would be better to put 'looking good' and change the 'your' to you're)
I concede you have your charms.

But I've never yet dreamt (A comma here)
of being in your arms.

Well, if you're writing this to a girl, please make sure that you put some of your own feelings into the poem, or it will be like asking a stranger to marry you. :D

Good luck.

Angel of Death wrote a review Review · Oct 2, 2008

Tis another great poem Kris!!! You have a way of getting a message across without making into thick and calorie filled. So now when I read poetry, my mind isn't gaining too much weight. ha ha. Anyways, you're a really great poet and I hope you keep writing great poems.
~Angel

User avatar
BlondeTwiggy
Review
BlondeTwiggy wrote a review Review · Sep 30, 2008

No, I like it short. The shorter the poem is, the better, in my opinion. Leaves us wondering...and leaves it open for interpretation. Sometimes it's better not to spell everything out. This is a really sweet poem, kris, I loved it. :D The last two lines are just powerful, great. And makes me wonder: Is (romantic) love really worth messing up an awesome friendship? Like you say, What's wrong with being friends? The obvious answer, Nothing. Lovely work.

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JosephDean
Review
JosephDean wrote a review Review · Sep 29, 2008

Fourth line, you need an apostrophe in "Whats." Fifth line, you need to change "your" to "you're."

It's really good, but really short, lol. Expand on it a bit if you plan to work on it. Let us know more about the "character," and why he thinks this way.

Random avatar
CJeanene13
Review
CJeanene13 wrote a review Review · Sep 29, 2008

Wow, that was good. It was short, simple, and full of tons of meaning.

You just need a capital W on the first line on Why. Thats about all I could find wrong.

I loved the expression and the simpleness of the attitude. I really like the feelings.

User avatar
xGraceex
Review
xGraceex wrote a review Review · Sep 29, 2008

wow, i really liked it! It was short, sweet and simple, just how i like them :D but i think if you sent this to a girl in an email as a sort of "Im sorry, but your not the one for me!" it would be like a slap in the face lol, teh last two lines are s of tough love
great poem :D



According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
— The Bee Movie