Young Writers Society

Hello, Empires here with a review.

Well, I liked the title and how fear was personified - it drew me in. Humor is quite subjective, that I understand. I didn't really understand the humor in this poem, perhaps because I am not an avid horror movie watcher? Nevertheless, I will try to comment on it and make a helpful suggestion.

"An understand came to mind"

I became quite lost at the beginning of this poem, did you mean to say "An understanding" ? If not then I'm not sure what this would be referring to.

"natural darkness"

What would be a "natural" darkness as isn't darkness a natural state in the absence of light? Apologies if I am reading too much into this, humor poem.


"She was
listening, wanting to teach a terrible
lesson to those who thought that
evil wasn’t just a cleverly made poem."

This was my favorite part, I think the ending was interesting and clever.


Keep writing!


--Empires

Hi,
You made me laughing (it's a humor poem after all), but I had to reread it slowly and again and again and aha! I broke a hahaha.

The combination between horror and humor is truly interesting to read especially a poem. Because of it's a poem, it's harder to make it work like it should be. Umm. I'm no clown or a humorist, so I can't give the appropriate advice to make it work.

I know this review is short, but you got only the punchline which is the last line:

evil wasn't just a cleverly made poem.

Oh boy oh boy, I love free verse poems. I don't understand all of it but reading it gave me shivers. It's one of those poems that have a really deep meaning and have hidden things in the context that most people would look over. Now the last two lines, I love it so much. Relating evil to a cleverly made poem is, well, clever. Cleverly made poems often have, as I said before, have lots of hidden things that most overlook. So from what i gather, this poem is about a doll or female that doesn't have a name, trying to teach those who don't believe in evil what it really is. Although this girl could be something like karma... I'd really like to know what it's about!!
I didn't see any errors or revisions, just an enjoyable poem. Thanks for the great work, this definitely a cleverly made poem my friend!

Hi
The way you've written made me feel speechless as it's too short to understand what you actually meant by the whole thing. Short words but a lot to speak. Moreover, i couldn't really relate the title with the writing because of it's length probably. But you have a stong grip of words and thoughts so explore it more. This short story reminded me of Annabelle, the doll whatsoever i enjoyed it. The moment i read the whole stuff it reminded me of the movie.Anyways, keep it up and keep writing. Please enhance the length as my mind craves for more shots and scenes.