Poems are a socially acceptable way of nonsense,
possibly meaningless words that form some strange metaphor,
or are just pure nonsense.
How do we stop this?
Hard-core Irish dancing?
Saying you're sorry a trillion times over?
Correcting your science teacher?
Using too many question marks?
.
I don’t care about society and your rules!
Just because you say something doesn’t make it just.
I am who I am,
you have a problem with that,
always,
but you can’t change it.
Or me.
.
So why should I change myself for everyone else?
Answer: no,
I shouldn’t
.
I feel that everyone wants me to take part in their stupid course of life,
to play by their rules,
become their perfect social robot-butterfly
that they want me to be.
But I’m no fool like that.
.
My will is as strong as a billion diamonds,
but you still proceed to try to chop me down,
with that ax
made of rules and regulations
that you constantly shove at me
but I will never take.
.
Poetry is a socially acceptable form of nonsense
In which everybody will be pleased with me.
But I write what I want,
am my own anti-social insect,
follow my own ‘trends’ and beliefs.
And nothing is going to change that.
Not even you.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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125,006 Literary Works • 672,809 Reviews
Hello, HolographicLadybug~
This is MergSword here with a review!
Grammar Issues and Other Errors
I found a grammar issue in the first stanza, but I don't know if that is really important considering this is a poem about breaking the rules of society, but I'll point it out anyway.
The "your" in this should actually be a "you're." It's not that big of a deal, but feel free to ignore it, or fix it.
The Pros of this Poem
I like the concept of the poem a lot, and that nobody should be controlling you as a puppet. You have you're own free will, you are who YOU are, and that nobody can change that. I believe this poem is also very relatable, and I can definitely connect with it. I also like the " social-robot butterfly" bit, and how you later said "anti-social insect"
The Cons of this Poem
I think you created a new line too often and various lines of the poem can be corrected. I also do not like the way you constantly shift from the idea of breaking the rules of society, and then going back to breaking the rules of poetry.
My Overall Opinion
I liked the concept of breaking free, being your own person and breaking the rules, but in some cases you could have expressed it better. All in all, the poem was excellent and inspiring.
~Keep on Writing!
Thanks for the review and pointing out my mistake!
Hey! Summer here, with a short review.
The way you talk about the 'other people' here, reminds me of the bullies that used to hurt me, and bullies everywhere. They have a problem with me:"I am who I am, you have a problem with that,
always," The 'social-robot butterfly' that everyone wants me to be is never going to exist. I love the last stanza or verse, I'm not sure what it's called. I love this poem and I can totally relate with it.
Keep Writing!!
SummerSunshine
Something went wrong here, this is not supposed to exist.
Hey! Summer here, with a short review.
The way you talk about the 'other people' here, reminds me of the bullies that used to hurt me, and bullies everywhere. They have a problem with me:"I am who I am, you have a problem with that,
always," The 'social-robot butterfly' that everyone wants me to be is never going to exist. I love the last stanza or verse, I'm not sure what it's called. I love this poem and I can totally relate with it.
Keep Writing!!
SummerSunshine
Hello, here to review!
I'd like to start off by saying that this is quite a good poem and I liked it a lot. I agree with the part about society trying to control everyone, and it's good to see people write about it. Now, whether you consider this "nonsense" or not, I am pleased with what you wrote, and as I continue in my review, I hope you don't think I am trying to change you, this is only constructive criticism.
This poem is very good and there are very few things that you could make better in my opinion.
First of all, there is a spelling mistake in the first paragraph:
And then there is this that bothers me a bit:
The reason it bothers me is because you ask the question Why should I change myself for everyone else? but, in the next two lines, you are actually answering the question Should I change myself for everyone else?. Now, maybe you did it in purpose, in which case there is no point to change it, but in case you hadn't noticed, it might sound better this way.
That is all I have to say for the cons. Everything else is good. I like it. I especially like the line:
And I like it simply because it is so unexpected and yet fits so well in the context of the lines before it.
Overall, congratulations for this piece, and keep writing!