Whispers of Death

Ok, I know the so called rhyme scheme kind of ends but this is all I can come up with. Help would be appreciated.

It happens again
murder breathes,
and just like a flash
their life ends.
In a dark corner
under the cover
of night,
another person breathes
their last goodbye.
The whispers of death
call to them,
pulling them closer
for a final breath.
Lives are but to lose,
every second the whispers come near
and never cease to take
your breath away.

Comments & reviews · 4
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User avatar
StoryWeaver13
Review

This was good, just not...I don't know...anything unusual? I think finding some more elaborate words to help it stand out a little bit would help, but that's just my opinion. :) Still, nice poem.

Oh, and Whispers is mispelled in the title. Just saying, if you didn't realize.

User avatar
dasiamari
Review

this was really good :D :o 8) :lol: :mrgreen: :elephant: :smt002 :smt003 :smt004 :smt005

User avatar
FLyerS
Comment

I enjoyed this. It was... truthful. Expand.



what are stories if not just vehicles for the pain of your own heart
— soundofmind