Hi ImHero! Sparkle here to review! Firstly, wonderful use of vacillated! That's not a word you hear every day. This poem portrays a very poignant sense of sorrow that is beautiful and haunting. I agree with niteowl about the line 'stepping the streets'. It seems a bit awkward and confusing, especially since the rest of the poem is so beautifully done. The flow and rhythm of this poem are wonderful, but the grammar could use some work. I don't really have much else to say that former reviewers haven't already said, so I'll leave it here. Good work, keep writing!
Hello Imhero!I'm here to review one more of your poems this review day!I loved this poem too, it was so small and so simple, yet it was so effective Flow was brilliant, capitalisation was perfect, and punctuation was great too!So there is no faults, I have no constructive critism. Nice work!~Keep writing
Hello ImHero. This has some lovely wording. I really love
I vacillated, on a vision of decay,
Within this leaf was life,Taken with a bit of rain;
Nice! I could visualize while reading. I really like the structure, but it would've better if you made the poem rhyme a little bit. Moreover, I encourage you to write more. I put myself in the shoes of the speaker. This is a very rich piece!
I like it... I can relate to it... It makes me feel like I am actually their!
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