I'm A Jesus Freak

by creativityrules

Published November 29, 2011

In Poetry

Spoiler! :
Comments, please? :D


So, you believe in God?
Then make him make my momma come back.

I can't, I say.
You look at me like I'm stupid.

So, you're a Jesus Freak?
Tell me, why don't he bring the soldiers home?

I can't, I say.
and you look at me like I'm an idiot.

You know what? I'm a Jesus Freak,
and just because I believe in Jesus doesn't mean I've become him.
If you believe in fairies, does it mean you've become one?
No! It does not! Do I make my point clear?

Why do I believe in God?
Well, why do you believe that when you buy a can of soup,
soup is what's going to be inside, and not Oreo cookies?
If you can have faith in a label plastered to a tin can,
an adhesive sticker manufactured in a factory overseas,
then I can have faith in Jesus, who is everlasting.

Do you think that just because I'm a Christian, my life is perfect?
No! It is not! I'm still human, aren't I?
You think that I don't get depressed, angry, or lonely?
You're so incredibly wrong.
I'm just a scared girl who's found some hope left in this world,
and I cling to it like a shipwrecked sailor lost at sea.
As long as I hold on, I'll survive. I'll hold onto Jesus.

Comments & reviews · 4
ObdurateMiller wrote a review Review · Nov 29, 2011

I really liked it and can relate because my closest friend is a Christian. She tells me all about Jesus and God and I believe too. You're completely right throughout the whole piece and I can't wait to read something else by you. Good job and good luck.

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magpie817 Review
magpie817 wrote a review Review · Nov 29, 2011

creativityrules,
I'm a Christian, and I feel this struggle all the time. It's really comforting to know that there are such devout Christians like you out there :) keep on in your strong faith, it's so inspiring!
Magpie

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misstoria
Review
misstoria wrote a review Review · Nov 29, 2011

Wow, I loved this poem. The emotions and story were really true.

So, you believe in God?
Then make him make my momma come back.
I can't, I say. [color=#FF0000here ] You may want to add quotes to clarify that you are speaking [/color]
You look at me like I'm stupid.

So, you're a Jesus Freak?
Tell me, why don't he bring the soldiers home?
I can't, I say. here, too
and you look at me like I'm an idiot.

You know what? I'm a Jesus Freak,
and just because I believe in Jesus doesn't mean I've become him.
If you believe in fairies, does it mean you've become one?
No! It does not! Do I make my point clear?

Why do I believe in God?
Well, why do you believe that when you buy a can of soup,
soup is what's going to be inside, and not Oreo cookies?
If you can have faith in a label plastered to a tin can,
an adhesive sticker manufactured in a factory overseas,
then I can have faith in Jesus, who is everlasting. I found this stanza cleaver and intresting

Do you think that just because I'm a Christian, my life is perfect?
No! It is not! I'm still human, aren't I? so true!
You think that I don't get depressed, angry, or lonely?
You're so incredibly wrong.
I'm just a scared girl who's found some hope left in this world,
and I cling to it like a shipwrecked sailor lost at sea.
As long as I hold on, I'll survive. I'll hold onto Jesus.


Keep writing! -Tori

AngusMacdonald wrote a review Review · Nov 29, 2011

Creativityrules,

Nice one! The poem was clearly heartfelt and genuine, and I like that in a poem. I do have a few minor quarrels, however. I thought at times the flow was off, and I know it probably wasn't meant to flow, but I just had a thought that maybe you could look at expanding and branching away from the poetry aspect of this piece, and maybe transform it into something more essay-like, if you know what I'm saying. I think if you put it into just one or two big paragraphs it would be excellent to read, simply because of the content.

Anyway, I liked the poem, you made your points very clear, and I liked the repetition in the first two stanzas.

Keep up the good work!

Angus



I understand what you're saying, and your comments are valuable, but I'm gonna ignore your advice.
— Roald Dahl