Men seek power, power to control all
The evil hearts of men run rampant
As the world seems to collapse,
When will you come and take Your people back?
This world offers nothing but pain and sorrow;
Endless cycles of power thrilled men go on
When will the new come and the old be gone?
Happiness lasts but for a second,
Then death and sickness strike with their poison
When will you strike down the wicked
And free the oppressed?
Oh, God bring peace to this mess...
Nation against nation, people against people
Satan reigns as prince of this world and laughs,
But I assure thee God will come back
With the army of Heaven, He will strike down the wicked
And free the oppressed
At Heaven we shall finally find peace and rest
No more death, sickness or sorrow; the new has come
With endless joy, dancing, and love we will sing
For the God of the Bible is the God who is King!
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Hello Windsailor!
What I liked:
-I really liked the last two lines, I like a rhyming couplet at the end of the poem, I think it may be over-exposure to Shakespeare.
-The message, a very strong and poetic argument calling for the coming of judgement day.
-The rhythm of the poem worked really well, and I don't think I could correct you on any sort of punctuation or line breaks.
What I am not too sure about:
-Surely we (as Christians) would wish for a more peaceful, God-loving world before Judgement Day, thus letting as many people enter the kingdom of Heaven as possible? I would be grateful for an answer, as I feel I may have a little misunderstanding in this area.
Overall very well done, God be with you!
Take That You Fiend!
Wow my friend!
This poem is superb as always! I really enjoyed the rhyme and rhythm! I really enjoyed the topic as well!
I think I could easily become an addict to your writing!
It's really superb! Keep up the good work!
~Your friend, M.H.L.
PeanutPhoebe, here to give you a review!!
Oh. My. Goodness. I loved this!! You really pull me in. It almost sounds like an extended Negro spiritual, which I LOVE. I also like how it's written in Psalm-like fashion, and I noticed in earlier comments that you said Psalms was your inspiration. You did really well with this. I may even write something similar because of this. You did amazing, and I really can not even find something to criticize!!:) Great job, keep writing!!
Lady Celestia, the Golden Knight.
Hey! ajruby here to review!
Alright, I just loved this! (It's written like a psalm and I gather it was supposed to be like that!) But I love reading the book of Psalms (In the Bible) and you just sucked me right in! I enjoyed the rollercoaster of feelings that I felt.
So great job, keep writing and Happy Review Day!
-Lady Arians, The Silver Knight
The Messenger Knight here to review for KotGR.
So, I have been faithfully following your posts and loved this one just like all of your others. This is almost written like a psalm. I don't know if you intended to do that but I think it helps with the flow. Even the words of the poem seem like a psalm. All of your grammar and punctuation seem to be in place as far as I can see. I enjoyed the ending immensely, and as always your poem was an encouragement and a good reminder.
Keep it up!
My inspiration was the book of Psalms and it is for a lot of my writing. I am glad you liked it.