Young Writers Society

Hey, WindSailor! It's ScytheMeister here for a quick review

First of all, I will comment on what I liked. I liked the concept, I'm not a devout believer, however I do accept the many beliefs that walk this earth and have debated the complexity and realism of most. What I loved about this was the emotion behind it. It did not tap into the complexity and force its words unto the reader (which I have sometimes found with certain [minority amounts] of religious works) but rather, it showed the emotion of this believer. It wasn't just directed towards religious groups. I think it could be interpreted beautifully by everyone and I think no matter what our background, no matter what we believe, we always have this doubt: Why me? Why us? Why are we the "chosen ones" essentially... Why do we deserve to survive?

However, there was the time in the poem in which Christ gave reassurance and guidance for the believer, which I found utterly beautiful. It shown a real connection between man and belief and it was heart-warming. Good Job!

I failed to find any real grammar mistakes. If there were and I haven't picked up on it, I apologise.

The layout though, is much different from most poems. I would have been nitpicky and disagreed with it but I actually found that it matched the contents of the poem quite well.

Good Job, I hope to read more like this

Keep Writing! <3

- ScytheMeister

In a moment so infinitesimally small, in the stillness of a long, drawn-out night like any other(,)
while my heart felt dread and fell cold as stone, he spoke

But God my questions(,)..

These sentence is too long to say in one breath I felt like it needed a comma. Sorry I dont know how to highlight sentences to comment on !

I think in the beginning you could describe where you are and what part of the environment made you suddenly feel worthless so readers can have a better understanding of how you came reflect on your past. Or if you don't know why you suddenly decide to think about this perhaps you could mention it.

YES YES YES and AMEN. Finally someone of alike faith! Beautiful words and concept, you just need a little help with the format. If you were making up your own way of doing poetry with the lines and things, awesome. But, if you were trying to go for something more traditional, I would suggest short lines and less words. Poetry is usually a power packed punch and one of the reasons why the form of writing that is poetry is so strong and great is because the Poet can portray what they are feeling in a smaller amount of words than most normal writers. That is pretty much the only thing I see here right now. But I really do love it. I legit fangirled when I read it because I was soooooo so so happy to finally read something that reminds me of God's grace and love. It is definitely the most amazing thing that I have ever felt and seen in my own life as well as others too. I marvel at your courage to publish something that is so outstanding with your faith too. Ugh it's just so great omg. Keep going!