This is for all the people who have been or are suicidal; you can make it, and you will make it. Life is hard; it is tough; it is crazy and unfair, but we are here. We on YWS care about you; we are a loving community. Although, we may disagree on a lot, there is one thing we all agree on; we value your life. Life, no matter how you view it, is a gift, it is your one and only chance on earth. So many people around the world choose to take their own life for various reasons, and it is a very sad thing, but it is true. Not only does it hurt them, but it affects everyone around them as well. So please, reach out to a friend tonight, you never know, it just might save their lives.
They are the stone-cold hearts, frozen over from the pain
so rock hard, that not even love could reclaim.
Broken from the abuse of the past,
their happiness doesn't last.
Traumatized, depressed, and suicidal,
looking for hope they struggle for survival.
Insanity overtook their minds
like a raging ocean's tide. And I was one of the many
My misery soared; my emotions were flippant,
and my friends were quick to mention.
Soon there after, there was no one left
there was never any rest.
I couldn't take it. On the floor, I cried
thinking this might be my last night.
The pills sat next to me, my note in hand
I had it all planned.
The voices; I heard them; they were loud
echoing to just do it; it's the easy way out.
You're weak, only the strong can survive,
and that is when I learned the thing that saved my life.
Strength is not in what you have done, or what you will do
it is what you are able to get through.
Being strong doesn't mean you don't cry
weakness teaches that lie.
To be strong, you must cry, so you know
and understand how it feels to be low.
You are strong, and we care
Don't take your life, please swear.
Your life is precious; it is your one chance
to make an impact and a difference.
So when you are down, weak, or depressed
just come and talk to one of us on YWS.
:)
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140,172 Literary Works • 673,034 Reviews
I am listening to a seriously sad piano song right now with a picture of a dog in the middle of the road in the snow right now, so this is having a huge impact on me. I think I'm gonna cry.....*wipes tear from eye* that was such a touching poem............*blows nose on handkerchief* do another one for me!!!! *bursts into tears*
I usually don't like "rhymey" poems, but this works! I only have a couple comments.
The last paragraph, I think you should do away with. It's a little cheesy; I understand what you're trying to say, but I feel like you should bring it full circle some other way.
This is really a meaningful and powerful poem. I love the line "My misery soared; my emotions were flippant, and my friends were quick to mention." Friends do jump at these sort of things, and you express that so easily without having to say it like "my friends noticed". And misery soaring is such a beautiful juxtaposition, usually you think of things soaring in the sense of happiness and bliss, not usually misery.
Well done!
Thanks for the review! Yeah, I agree with you about the last stanza being cheesy, but I kinda personal like it. Sort of, I was questioning putting it in.
Meh. We all have those haha
I really like what you did here. I have a huge heart, I will try and help as many strangers as I can from ending their lives, so this spoke to me. It's how I met a few good friends and my boyfriend. I don't know I have a special place in my heart for anyone who just needs someone to be there for them. So I really like that you wrote this. I hope it helps save as many people as it can. I didn't notice anything grammatically incorrect so A+ there. Your punctuation seems on point also so another A+ for you. I just really love what you did here, wish there were more people like you who want to reach out to others. Thank you I guess.
hey, WindSailor!
I must admit, to begin with, I wasn't a fan of the rhymes and rhythms you used, it kind of lacked in tempo to me and I would have rather seen a more abstract format.
BUT your last stanza impressed me. I realized this was a deep, personal poem, but had a lighthearted, 'ray of hope' so-to-speak at the end.
Suddenly, the poem had a different light to me.
One thing I definitely wish you'd pick out though is the note in parenthesis at
(just a note: No I am not suicidal)
My misery soared; my emotions were flippant,
It was quite unnecessary and took away from the poem.
This begin said, though, I liked the piece from the start. Nice word choice. I'm a sucker for that.
I felt close to it initially because of the impact suicidal thoughts and depression have had on my life. Thank you for reaching out through this writing; that's what it's all about.
Nice job
~iron.n