Time and time again,
I fall short of the goal.
I reach through the struggle,
Only to find that I missed my mark.
*
*
Time and time again,
I say one thing and do another,
My words are pointless, and my words are empty.
As I sit here and think upon my failings,
I wonder why I even bother.
*
*
Time and time again,
Rejection calls my name.
Echoing, reverberating through my mind,
A tear sheds, and all hopeful thoughts are laid waste.
*
*
My conclusion,
There is nothing good in this world.
It is all pain, sorrow, and anguish.
If anything good arrives,
It is destroyed.
Time and time again.
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140,172 Literary Works • 673,034 Reviews
Great. Reading through that I found a lot of things that I can associate really well with such as the parts about falling short of goals, hopeful thoughts getting wasted and wondering why I bother.
Really enjoyed reading.
This highlights all the feelings of failing at something over and over again and some of the thoughts that can go through you're mind when something like that happens.
Really well written
Very melancholy! Unfortunately, I think a lot of people can relate to this.
I like the repetition of "time and time again." It serves as a good vehicle to reinforce the theme of monotonous existential suffering.
One thing I would change up is rewording any line that begins with "As." It breaks up the flow of the poem and dampens the action. For example:
Could be reworded as:
Rejection calls my name,
Echoing, reverberating through my mind.
I also like the change to the poem that defyinggravity suggested -- it makes it flow much better.
Overall, I thought this was good. You did a good job of conveying the thoughts of the narrator, and the poem flows very well.
I like this. I thought the repetition was a great element. However, I think this poem would really benefit from some structure. It needs stanzas. This way, the stanzas will really emphasize the "Time and Time again" repetition. I think your punctuation and grammar was superb.
One thing I loved (I can't get over this) is how you used the word "reverberates". It was such a good vocabulary word and it tied this poem together. The only thing I think you should change besides the stanzas is this line:
When you say "It is all",the way you used it prepared me to read a list of nouns. Instead you go adjective, adjective, noun. (I know it sounds weird, sorry). So I think it would be much better like this
"It is all pain, sorrow, and anguish."
I thought this was a lovely poem, and I can really relate to the narrator (or possibly the poet). Especially when I feel like I can't do anything right. You did an amazing job, and your rhythm was perfect. Thank you for the privilege to read such a lovely poem
-Gravity
Where should I split it into stanzas? Thanks for the review!
Okay. Try splitting it into stanzas so that the phrase "Time and Time again" is at the beginning of each stanza. Does this help? And you're welcome
I like this. I can really relate to it.
Thanks!