Chapter 19.4

Author's Notes: 1,212 words

"They've been talking for a while now."

"Hm? Oh, yes, yes, they seem fond of each other."

Katerina sat on the grass outside the hospital, pulling her knees against her chest. She rocked back and forth gently as Eremia buried her nose in a book.

"It worked, you know."

Rising her head, Eremia sighed. "He was right," she said.

Katerina shook her head. "Aquila probably spent his whole life being told how great Exedor's royalty was, so I'm not surprised he freaked out over you. I don’t think he would’ve hurt anyone; he just need to calm down."

Watching the clouds overhead, Eremia mumbled, "My family is great." She smiled faintly. It vanished when she saw Jonathan’s face in the clouds.

Eremia glanced away in time to see Katerina's eyes widen. "You never talk about them much. What were your parents like? Did you have any cousins or uncles or anyone like that? Anybody you had a crush on?" Katerina, biting her lip to stop the grin on her face, leaned against Eremia.

"My father and mother were the two most loving parents I could have," said Eremia, focusing on the blue sky while gently pushing Katerina back. "I suppose that was compensation for their hardly ever being around."

Katerina nodded, her smile fading. "My parents sent me off to live in Wyandanch for my training when I was a little girl. I never saw them much, so we're in the same boat."

A question leaped onto Eremia's tongue and just as quickly escaped. "Did you ever see the King?" Finally, somebody else to think about.

"A few times," said Katerina slowly, waiting just long enough for Eremia's curiosity to turn to an impatience that manifested itself in waved hands. "Usually surrounded by his bishops."

"Did he ever notice you?" Eremia went back to her reading, taking a few glances at Katerina to watch the latter's expression.

"Of course not," Katerina said, laughing. "He was too busy being led around the streets or asking The Pillars for blessings or something else royal."

Craning her head to the side, Eremia squinted at the horizon and spotted the vague, misty outlines of The Pillars. The black towers shot upwards into the sky without limit; as she'd heard, there was none. That they were visible from a large part of the world had always baffled her, but she'd always admired them. They were, as she believed, the protruding part of the core upon which The Creator and His Sons had made the world.

Muffled footsteps. Eremia saw Katerina looking behind her and did the same. Approaching them was Madeleine, face pale and haggard. Madeleine waved weakly, arm flopping to the side as she eased herself onto the ground beside them. "Evening," she said, propping up an elbow on her leg and resting her head on her hand.

"How've they been?" Katerina said first, cutting through the suspense that flooded the air.

"Fine," said Madeleine. "Aquila's calmed down some. They're actually striking up conversations now."

Eremia immediately perked up. "Are they no longer enemies, then?" she asked, focusing her gaze on Madeleine.

Madeleine's face briefly contorted in rage. "They lived their trial by fire."

"We have to confront our fears," Eremia returned, trying not to grit her teeth. She felt it would make her look undignified. She already hated herself enough; like she was about to let someone else do so. "Is that not right?"

Brow furrowed, Madeleine grew even paler in the sunlight. "I have no idea what you're talking about," she said, voice cracking. She composed herself in a deep breath. "As for you, feel fortunate that they didn't tear each other's throats out. That was beyond reckless."

Katerina, who appeared frightened, pushed herself forward so that she would not be in between them.

"Had I not intervened, it would have happened eventually. If they had been left to simmer in anger, it would have been much worse." Eremia's scowled, feeling her face grow hot.

"Perhaps," said Madeleine. "But Jonathan told me all about your decision, and he thought it would've been better if you'd talked to the both of them, since they have respect for you."

Eremia opened and closed her mouth. It wasn’t something she’d considered. Her voice waned with her anger, replaced by a guilt and pushed her closer to the pages of her book. "Is he here?"

Madeleine snorted. "Alarick has him training again. The kid's tired and bitter, but Alarick's made sure to keep him out of my hands."

A couple minutes passed by in silence. Madeleine finally rose up, brushing off grass stains. "It worked," she said at last, staring down at Eremia's curling herself into a ball and reading. "You took a great risk, and it paid off. He's not happy with you, sure. I'm not happy with you either. Honestly, it's mostly that you're trying to justify yourself that gets on my nerves. What you've done isn’t nearly as stupid as some of the stuff we’ve done. The years before I came to the Confederacy are a good example of that.

"You're going to do much worse things than this, and I'll tell you right now that you'll have worse reasons. And that's fine, because you're flawed. Everyone's flawed. I wish you’d apologize for once, but I guess you've done well enough that you don't really have to. Just stop pretending you’re perfect, because you’re not fooling anyone. Especially yourself."

Madeleine stood in place, hands on her hips. Eremia knew she was looking for an apology, or maybe just any sign of recognition. "...Sorry," she said at last, though it hurt to say it. "It was foolish of me, even if it was successful."

Now Madeleine nodded and walked away. She turned just before the corner of the hospital tent. "Also, it's pretty clear you're sweet on Jonathan, and vice versa. All I have to say is that you'd better watch out for Terasu. You also don't need to always put his logic above your own, because the Creator knows that he's not perfect either, not by a long shot."

Katerina reappeared soon after Madeleine left. "I went off to do a little eavesdropping," she said without embarrassment, beaming in what appeared to be an attempt to remove Eremia's frown. "Sounds like Aquila wants to help Iasquam" - she still struggled with the syllables, saying them slowly - "learn how to not be afraid when he flies. You want to talk to them?"

Would they be angry at her? Would they decide that she had been reckless, as she knew was the case? At the same time, she didn't have much else to do. Besides, if the birds were working hard to build trust between each other, they weren't likely to criticize her for her part in it. If they did, then perhaps she deserved it. Eremia closed the book, holding it in one arm, and accepted Katerina's outstretched hand. Katerina pulled Eremia up.

Holding each other's hand as they walked towards the tent, Eremia felt the weight lifted off her shoulders and replaced by a growing calmness.

In that moment, Eremia believed that she had almost everything that she wanted, save for Jonah. She was not going to let anything else she had slip away.