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Hope

by Nike


I don't know how to start this so, I'll try my best anyway.

There's always this hope that lingers in you like a drug that you got addicted to. Or a song you can't stop listening to. Or an alcohol you just wont stop drinking every night. That's a reason people tend to give up on hope. On the future. They just fall into this hole and never get out.

They believe the world, their life, will just go and flow. Don't make plans. Don't do anything. Just live. It's terrifying, I would know, to live. But you have to do something to make it special.

You have to do something to make your life mean something.

Then again, there's always these people that hope way too hard. For example, me.

All I know is hope. Is wishes. I believe that if I hope enough, wish every night, something will happen. It hurts whn in the end my dream breaks. My heart crushing beneath me like glass.


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Points: 646
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Wed May 08, 2013 2:21 am
memybooksandI wrote a review...



Good day!

I really liked it...but in my opinion it much better if it's in poem form or anything. Or articles. It's not much of a story...more of a...poem. But the story...I really liked it. It's realistic and maybe even eye-opener, in fact....
Keep up the good work...:)

memybooksandI




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Points: 500
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Tue May 07, 2013 9:35 pm
SalmanK says...



Can u please comment or review my work as well
work.php?id=101303




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Tue May 07, 2013 9:28 pm
SalmanK wrote a review...



The starting was awesome:

There's always this hope that lingers in you like a drug that you got addicted to. Or a song you can't stop listening to. Or an alcohol you just wont stop drinking every night.

But then I really didn't understand what message you were trying to give through this piece .
I didn't understand the purpose as well of this as well .

But as I said I loved the starting so keep it up !

Try to rewrite it , this time with a purpose !

Keep it up , good work :)




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Tue May 07, 2013 9:18 pm
roxyask wrote a review...



Hi there Roxy here! :)

I think that you have an interesting concept idea to this piece! :) The idea of loosing hope and comparing it to the concepts of drugs and alcohol, the additive subsatances.
I would love to see you beef this piece out! I feel that you have the skeleton of a fantastic piece! Youve great original ideas and sentences, such as "There's always this hope that lingers in you like a drug that you got addicted to."
Add a bit more personality to the piece and fill it out! I keep saying this cause I want there to be more ( which is a good thing!)
So keep it up! Its going to be a brilliant piece! :D




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72 Reviews


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Tue May 07, 2013 7:01 am
GrapeNerd wrote a review...



Hullo, GrapeNerd here to review your fantastic work of art!

Though this short story (is this is short story?) was amazing, some of your paragraphs seemed kind of odd to me.

There's always this hope that lingers in you like a drug that you got addicted to. Or a song you can't stop listening to. Or an alcohol you just wont stop drinking every night. That's a reason people tend to give up on hope. On the future. They just fall into this hole and never get out.

This paragraph seemed a little stiff to me, probably because there were too many periods. I think the first paragraph should be more like this,

There's always this hope that lingers in you like a drug you got addicted to. Or a song can't stop listening to, or an alcohol you just won't stop drinking. That's the reason people tend to give up on hope, on the future. They just fall into this hole and never get out.

That's probably the only problem here. Your wording was great and so was everything else! I really liked this story and I hope to see more works like this from you. I hope this was helpful!
Keep writing!
GrapeNerd




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Tue May 07, 2013 5:38 am
Chuck10931 wrote a review...



Hello. I am Chuck and I will being doing this review.

Okay what struck me first is this paragraph here:

There's always this hope that lingers in you like a drug that you got addicted to. Or a song you can't stop listening to. Or an alcohol you just wont stop drinking every night. That's a reason people tend to give up on hope. On the future. They just fall into this hole and never get out.

Now I don't know much about grammar but haven't you listed things here?
So shouldn't it be more like this?

There's always this hope that lingers in you like a drug that you got addicted to. Or a song you can't stop listening to, or an alcohol you just wont stop drinking every night.
That's a reason people tend to give up on hope, on the future. They just fall into this hole and never get out.

What also struck me was that you have put 'On the future.' in it's own sentence that doesn't make sense. It may but just look word I don't know as I said before I don't know much and that you're probably better at this stuff then me. But to me this just seemed weird.

That's all I have for now. I hope this was helpful.
Keep up the good work!





Maybe our favorite quotations say more about us than about the stories and people we're quoting.
— John Green