Yams here for a review!
I felt like everything after the fourth paragraph was weaker than the rest. The imagery kind of leaves and it just goes on to stuff we've heard before. I don't think I've heard "skins of an onion" before.
I'm supposing "shad" is supposed to be "shade".
The "Ugh!" at the end really makes it less poetic and it just feels stupid to have it there. Anyone can do an "Ugh!" for a line and it feels unnecessary.
Have a great day!
Points: 220
Reviews: 1081
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