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Hi, this is ZeldaIsShiek, here to review another amazing piece of poetry and beat the Werewolves once and for all! For the Witches shall win in the end! Of this I am certain. The first thing I noticed was how the first and last lines were italicised. This is because they are the question and the answer. They are the communication between characters, while the rest of the text is just thought and reasoning that is being said before the other character answers the question that the poet asks. Either this is the case, or the poet is talking to themselves and wondering if they can start again by thinking about it long and hard before coming to a conclusion.

The way you tie the poem to the title is quite beautiful, and it is truly amazing how you manage to complete the story in just a few, short lines. That is a true talent and a sign of a great writer and poet. For that, I commend you. I also noticed that none of the lines rhyme at all. This is fine with me, since I actually prefer it when non-lyrical poems will stay that way and express a point or an opinion without encroaching on the territory of songs. That is why this poem is so majestic in my eyes. It is truly a work of art with no errors, and nothing more to say but "+1 follower". Goodnight! (Not really)

-ZeldaIsShiek

Hey marmalade, Lily here for a quick review..

The poem is simply beautiful. Especially the way you started your poem with a question,that brings up curiosity in the reader's mind of what next. That is indeed an appreciable idea.
This poem is short but very captivating. I'm sure it even relates to the real life story of most of the reader's so that thing makes the readers more connected to the poem..maybe gets them a feeling like 'Exactly'.

But maybe a few changes can make it more wonderful.I'm sure that's something that you must have forgotten as you have written such a beautiful piece of art..that actually has a touch of reality.
So here are a few suggestions I'd like to mention:
At first capitalize the first letter of the title of the poem.That's because the title of poem is what attracts the readers.
Secondly, The first letter of the first lines should be in capitals too..that would give it a proper display.

"Can we start again?
Reset the clock in the morning
and hope for the best.
These days seem to go so quick
and yet so slow...
I need time to catch my breathe
Or do i need to stop?
I'm not sure."

I did a bit of editing work ..i'm sure you can make it much better..this is just a glimpse of how u can turn it into much attractive one.
Loved your poem anyways..keep posting.

-Lily ^_^

hi. this is kman134. i'm here to review your work.

This is pretty good. it's short, sweet, and down to the point.

"i need time to catch my breath or do i need to stop?"

this part gives a brilliant representation of time and patience. how the narrator wants to think before he/she acts. however, the one problems is that the I's aren't capitalized and that can be a problem.

the way it is structured is pretty good. it gave a good message of time and the act of decisions when being in a relationship. that's all i have to say.

i look forward to reading more of your work.

Marm,

Part of the fun of poetry is reinvention and you do this so well with reinventing your lines and and your form and breath patterns, but I might suggest as I always do your word choices need a looking into. Your beginning line works fabulously, rife with tension and mystery and intrigue. Starting again always suggests a conflict with the narrator's "first" start, so I like that.

"hope for the best" is weak in comparison as a common phrase we all say, why not mess with it? Play with it? I get that you're rhyming best/reset, but in such a space so small you need all the room to pack power, and this line doesn't do that for me. Suppose you wrote:

"reset the clock in the morning/ and hope for crisp baguettes"

Not the best line I'm sure you can do better than that, but I just wanted to point out that you can still rhyme and add in more specificity at the same time, you don't need to resort to the easier rhymes with words that won't add anything. With baguettes you at least add in more imagery and something of an intrigue there. Why is the narrator hoping for crisp baguettes, are all of their mornings filled with moldy baguettes? That's the kind of thing your poem here is lacking - that character element. Define exactly what it is that is your narrator's version of "the best" and we will get more insight into that narrator's character and into that narrator's day.

You don't need "at the same time" in line 4. I would scratch that part out to keep a parallel flow, I would also rid all of the "so", what do they really add to the piece? I had a professor once tell me "If you're going for short, it better be short!" and would say this while scratching out all of our "verys" "reallys" "justs" "sos" and soforth That advice has served me well, so paying it forward here.

"catch my breath" is another common phrase that is ripe for your taking. Experiment around and see what you can do with it. Although, I am fine with leaving it as is, but I thought I'd mention.

I think you can get rid of "I'm not sure", I think that the fact the narrator is asking the question in the first place is already pointing to their doubts and frustration. I also think that it can be more powerful to stop at a stop. I think too it puts more emphasis on the meaning of those words. Stop what? Stop your day? Stop breathing?

And that drama is a more excellent end point.

Hope this helps!

~ as always, Audy

I like this. I feel it's shortness adds a bit of quirkiness to it. I like how you ask a question of the reader, this gets them thinking. Good tactic. I think when you say, 'I need time to catch my breath or do I need to stop', you need to make sure that the I's are capital and add a 'do' before the 'I need to catch my breath'. Other than that this poem is really good. I look forward to reading more poems from you.