i love you mommy.

You did something that I rarely do, your piece brought tears to my eyes. Only con I have an im killing myself for even finding one is make sure your lower case i's are I's you'll get a lot of grief if you don't.

Now onto this im going to be quite honest. While your lines are short and simple told the story and painted a beautiful picture. You make the reader go on a emotional rollercoaster. Your last line though was brilliant.

I loved how each stanza told a different side of the babies life from beginning to end it was amazing

You are incredible writer what I saw here and I can't wait to read more from you.

P.S may send a riot to that father, I already have the hounds at the ready just need your go

Okay hello, I read I want to Be Punished No More Daddy(long title) and I thought these two things would be connected. The genre is though. I started reading it and it was so sweet and I almost cried then when I got to the part about the dad I was a little mad and teary. So as I was reading this the thought slipped through my mind about an abortion especially since it was too late and I was really sad to find that she(it's a she right?) died.

It's a good poem but I can't say it was touching the beginning and maybe middle was but yeah. Also I'd like to know what it was you read.(Even though this is a very late review)

thanks for the reviews.
thank you adriana. i think i should have added a few more commas. thanks for the help.
and i made a pretty big mistake in the poem.
20 months was supposed to be 20 weeks. but i guess it doesnt effect the poem much.

What an amazing poem!!
Seriously, I love how you make the time pass at each stanza. But I really think there are missing commas...

manisha wrote:Hi, mommy.

You don’t know about me yet,
I am just a few weeks old.
Soon I am going to be yours,
Your one and only.
I already love you, mommy.
A lot.

Today you told daddy
About me. He didn’t sound happy.
But you were though,
So its okay.
But daddy hit you.
I could feel it.
I could feel your hands flying to protect me.
Why are you crying, mommy?
It makes me sad.
He is a bad man, mommy.
I’ll take care of you.

Now you can see me.
You are happy looking at your big tummy.
It makes me happy too.
I love your voice, mommy,
It makes me feel safe.
Thank you for singing
To me every day.
I love you, mommy.

Today daddy came to see you.
He hit you again, mommy
He said I was wrong.
What did i do?
Am I really wrong, mommy?

You don’t sing to me anymore
Why is that?
But you still touch your belly
And I giggle.
I love that, mommy.

Today I am a big baby.
I am 20 months old.
You are taking me somewhere new.
Are we celebrating, mommy?

Mommy I can’t hear you
Is everything alright?
Tell me you love me
I want to feel safe.

Mommy! It hurts!
What are they doing to me?
Make them stop!

I am alright now.
It’s ok mommy.
I am in heaven.
But why did you send me here?
Did I do something wrong?
Do you also hate me, mommy?
I love you.

Take me back. I want to grow up.
To see your beautiful face.
Don’t you love me? I do.
I am sorry if I did anything wrong.

I love you, mommy.

Awww... that was so touching! It made me want to cry. You really have a talent for expressing emotions. I salute you for that. Throughout the poem, you kept writing 'mommy' to tell the readers that it's a little child who is talking here. And you flawlessly showed the bond between a mother and her child. The mother loves her child so much that she protects it with her life. Beautiful piece. Do post more poems. You're a very talented writer.