16+

Commitment

Warning: This work has been rated 16+.

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Your coal dust covered fingertips touched my body, leaving trails of inky sin and decay.

You changed my life in such a way, that now when I try to embrace someone in hopes of heated love, they stain too and I am reminded.

Reminded of your thoughts and goals.

How you wanted nothing more than to press me up against a wall and have me beg.

Did someone stain you too?

Since you left that decay on my theoretical skin and heart, I am scared of commitment.

I cry just from holding hands because now I feel like I love you again but still I must convince myself that you are no good for me.

Just like cigarettes and god knows what other harmful things I have done to this vessel I call my body.

My favorite songs, clothes, and blankets are now tainted with your voice.

Everywhere I turn I see something that vaguely gives me an inkling of you.

It's an exponential growth, because the person who has stained you is staining other people, you are staining, and now I am just another numerical figure in this equation cesspool.

Tell me who hurt you so I can stop them, stop you, stop me.

I cannot idly stand by and watch this horrible staining go on.

Yet look at me, look at you, spreading our filthy desires onto other people, hoping that maybe we can learn to love them back.

Comments & reviews · 2
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I love this poem. The analogy of someone leaving their mark behind on someone they hurt is perfect! It perfectly reflects the way that people feel after someone has hurt them and how it is hard to give yourself up again after what happened the first time. I feel like the end could be a bit stronger, just to leave readers with something to think about, but other than that I thoroughly enjoyed reading it and thought it was a very good poem. :)

Thank you, that is exactly what I wanted to convey! I agree that my poem could be a bit stronger at the end and I'll probably edit it someday.

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Lieke
Review
Lieke wrote a review · Mon Dec 07, 2015 11:08 am

Wow, what a wonderful poem! I think you're using all the right words, making me feel the emotions behind this.

I do think however that most sentences are too long. In my opinion, this would work better in separate stanzas with shorter sentences.

Also, small mistake: "nothing more then" -> it's than instead of then here.

Thank you! I was thinking the same thing with the stanzas but wasn't sure if I should change it or not, thanks for the advice! omg thank you, i would have never noticed that mistake.



Not me seeing all these wall posts about peoples quotes and wondering: "When will it be my turn?"
— thetaostedwriter