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Young Writers Society



You don't trust me...

by anne27


I spend so much time with you

I try to give you joy and merriment

You try too, but not in a lovable way

You laugh with me; it doesn't reach your eyes

You talk to me so much; it lacks depth

You cry with me; only when watching emotional movies

I want to see your eyes happy too

I want to talk to you about meaningful things

I want you to be free to cry due to your struggles

-

I wish after all this time

You trusted me to not show your

Fake Smiles.


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10 Reviews


Points: 86
Reviews: 10

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Fri Jan 28, 2022 9:19 pm
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LadyTano wrote a review...



Goodday, Anne!
First off, I liked this poem a lot, it held a lot of emotion. I'd like to note that I've never read the book it is inspired by, and yet, I get the picture.
This is my favorite part:

I want to see your eyes happy too

I want to talk to you about meaningful things

Although, the next sentence feels a little unnecessarily wordy:
I want you to be free to cry due to your struggles

But maybe that's just my preference.
The poem could benefit from some more punctuation, but it's fine without it.
I like how you capitalized the last two words to reflect the title of the book.
Once again, I like the poem, and I can't wait to see what else you write!

-Lady Tano




anne27 says...


Thanks for the review Ladytano! Glad you liked it.:)
Btw, it's just a song- Fake a Smile not a book <3



LadyTano says...


Oh. Oops. :)



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969 Reviews


Points: 126
Reviews: 969

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Fri Jan 28, 2022 4:28 pm
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vampricone6783 wrote a review...



We all have someone who still has stuff going on,who doesn’t feel comfortable talking to others,even if you know them well.It hurts,but it’s true.Maybe they’ll talk one day.If not,speak to someone else about their problems and ask them to help.Overall,I enjoyed reading the poem you made.I hope you have a lovely and amazing day and night.




anne27 says...


Thanks for the review Vampricone! I hope you have a lovely day too<3




Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
— Mark Twain