Who am I?

Hi thewritersdream !

This is really good. Like, really really good I think you had a great idea and turned it into something amazing. It is very beauitul.

I like almost every sentence of this piece, but my favorite is : "My heart is a rock that I pump to life." It is so beautiful, and I love that you enden with it too. It makes the ending very powerful.

You are great at using imagery, it makes the poem emotional and touching. It is very relatable too The wording of the piece is beautiful, and makes the poem special

The only sentence I wasn't so happy with was: " My night time is day, my day time is night. I didn't think it was as special as the other sentences and definitely not important enough to be in the very last stanza. But that is just my opinion

I like the title, It goes very nice with the rest of the piece

Overall, amazing job ! Just keep writing

Hey TheWritersDream,. But, I think that suits it perfectly.

Beautiful poem. Well, in it's own little way. I love the first stanza. It's perfect. I noticed that it's not following a constant pattern, but, I think that suits it perfectly.

My breath is the king if you mean of destruction,
Because the words it comes with are not for construction.

I love these two lines. They way the entire poem flowed together perfectly is just, well, perfect. Overall, great job! Stay strong and keep writing!

-FCS

I absolutely love the first stanza. It creates a nice image and rhymes well. You stop rhyming in the second stanza but the whole pace changed so it still works. The second stanza uses more advanced language than the first which I like.

My breath is the king if you mean of destruction,
Because the words it comes with are not for construction.

This poem is somewhat interesting in a sense, but I couldn't really grasp the concept of it. The flow is pretty decent and the stanzas, well, I honestly don't know what to make of them. Overall, I think you could really be a good writer someday. The nature of this poem however is very unique and bizarre, which I love! I would strongly recommend keeping up this style of writing and mix it up a little bit if you want.

Alright, firstly, the spacing hurts one's eyes. You could do away with it.
Secondly, "My ears a locked shut" (? 'My ears ARE locked shut')

To be honest enough, the poem didn't have quite an effect on me. But the ease with which your words seem to flow is really good. In fact I can hear a beat throughout it.