Warm feelings, exciting heart
A perfect smile, a piece of art
Making his little heart skip a beat
From a first look, eyes tangle
Wondered if the heaven
Lost an angel
Surely this seems nothing like human
He felt the time stops
As she smiled
the pure and the innocence
of a child
nervously looking away
then impatiently staring again
at the shining gold strands of her hair
laying down on her face
As he looked away
He thought
How can the moon and the sun
simply Connect like one
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140,223 Literary Works • 673,046 Reviews
hi, it's chinku.
well, the poem is beautiful explaining a persons attraction towards the a beautiful lady, like a love at first site. it gives a true feeling of attraction and love, like, i am falling from the sky. and i love that, how you have created a connection between the beauty of a lady and the beauty of the nature.
word placement is so nice giving a pleasant chant. simply I love it.
keep writing good things and all the best.
i'm really glad you liked it.thank you so much, it means a lot.
Hiya! I think this is an AMAZING poem, it really captures the true bliss and innocence of a first love. I think its not overly complicated to understand like some poems and anyone (or most people) can read this poem and relate. So good job on that because that's a hard thing to do. Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed your poem and I hope you will write many more.
thanks for your comment, it really means a lot
Whoa, now thats a nice one. An amazing tone, but just telling you, its "impatient" instead of "unpatient". But grammatic errors arent as important, overall, great job. Hope to hear some more in the future.
well thank you for the supportive comment
Np C: