• Home

Young Writers Society

16+ Violence

The Adventures of Rose Hood Chapter 12: The Draconic Revelation

by keeperofgaming

Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for violence.

Galswell POV

Rose was back fast, I know she had tricks up her sleeve, but teleportation magic was still unexpected.

“My king, what is it that you need?”

“As you know, Rose has returned.”

“Yes sir.”

“She subjugated a fire dragon that made its nest in the dungeon.”

“She did?”

This was shocking. Even Saliad would struggle to beat a dragon head on, and she beat it in less than 4 days.

“Why did you call me?”

“Well, she couldn’t harvest anything from the dragon, so I want you to go and see what you can gather from the dragon.”

“Alright, when shall I go?”

“As soon as you can. I want to be able to give her some of the materials when she meets with me.”


I teleported to the dungeon entrance and flashed my pass.

“I’m on official business from the king to dismantle the boss.”

“Yes, Sir Galswell.”

I walked into the cave and noticed the sheer number of monsters. I had to fight them all.

I noticed skeletons of some orcs and goblins, next to them were ogre skeletons.

“Licked clean. Did she eat them? What kind of powerhouse is she?”

I walked further down, and when I got to the door, I felt a massive presence behind it.

“Could the mythic have already been replaced by another?”

I opened the door to find an elven woman. She was eating a goblin’s leg sitting on her throne.

I recognized her presence immediately. A dragon.

“A dragon came to replace their sibling?”

“Who are you?”

“My name is Galswell, I came to dismantle the previous boss who was killed yesterday.”

“Mine is Thalia, I recognize you and I know you are aware of what I am.”

Negotiations wouldn’t work. So, I had to trick it. I realized something was wrong. There were no dragon corpses. Rose had lied, she never killed the boss. That could only mean one thing.

“You can leave now as long as you never mention me.”

“Is Rose a dragon too?”

She froze, dropping the goblin leg before judging me with a new look of fear.

“Y-you can still leave as long as you don’t reveal anything you learned here. Just say the boss was little more than dust when you showed up, please.”

The beast was concerned for her sister. Cute. I wasn’t leaving, especially since there were eggs in the back of the hall.

“I’m w-warning you...”

Her confidence diminished as my aura glowed.

“Hey, get away. Stay away!”


“A shame indeed.”

“To think that that is why she was so strong.”

“A dragon killed the dragon slayer, it’s almost poetic.”

“I will set up a trap, the beast will die.”

“This one will be used to draw out its nature.”

“Please... don’t hurt my sister, she only wan- GHH!”

With a stern kick the beast falls unconscious with tears in her eyes, if I didn’t know it was a dragon, I’d feel sorry for it.


I went to the castle; the guards directed me to the throne room. Where there were nobles the last time I was here, there were multiple guards that I could tell were strong. Something was happening.

“Hello, Rose.”

“Greetings, your majesty.”

“I heard you subjugated the dungeon in 4 days.”

“Yes, your majesty.”

“You know, I was curious on how you were so strong.”

“Training from a young age.”

“And you being a dragon of course.”

I raised my head, but it was too late. An arrow shot me through the eye. I snarled.

“When I heard that you went to the dungeon and returned that quickly, having killed a dragon, I was shocked. I decided to send Galswell to gather what could be scavenged from the dragon. As he had teleport, he could do it quickly.”

I was in significant pain. It was a cursed arrow laced with dragonsbane.

“So, imagine the surprise he was in, when the dragon was alive and well.”

Galswell walked in, with Thalia in elven form sputtering blood and sobbing. She was thrown next to me.

I stood up. There was no point in pretending anymore.

“Why hurt me and Thalia?”

“Because, dragons are dangerous, and don’t worry. Galswell made sure to destroy her nest and the eggs inside. We won’t be having any new dragons now.”

That little *****. I’m going to kill him and that smug king next to him.

“You are angry? I thought dragons were impassive beasts. I guess even monsters can feel pain.”

That arrow injury wasn’t healing. It had a powerful curse on it. They were going all out.

“Kill the fire dragon, Galswell. We have no more need for her.”

“With pleasure, Sire.”

They thought I would stand by? Idiots.

By the time Galswell charged up his kill blow, his head had gone on a vacation.

“Galswell! … You.”

“You expect me to stand by as you kill my sister?”

“That curse should’ve stunned you, and besides, you’ve killed dragons yourself. That arcane aspect tells us that much.”

I laughed bitterly,

“Dragons can use their own aspects, fool.”

The king realized that I was far stronger than he gave me credit for.

“Guards, kill both of them, now!”

I needed to defend my sister and get out of this town before we died. I stood over her, snarling at anyone who came close. They were all cautious. I slowly backed towards a window.

“Hah, I have guards at the windows ready to shoot you on sight.”

“Were Jalad and Dallel involved in this?”

“No, they care about you too much to go against you. I don’t know what spell you used on them, but they actually care about you.”

I realized that they weren’t attacking out of malice, but because they thought we were evil. The world saw dragons as mythic monsters. The only reason Royce and his men realized that view was wrong was because I risked my life to save them.

These people had no knowledge of the event, so they thought I was gathering up influence to gain power. They had no idea that I could actually care for people.

All of the sudden my anger left. I was angry only at Galswell, who saw my fight with Saliad and understood it deeper than anyone else, but still saw me as a heartless monster, when even Saliad noted that I was good.

I decided to take the risk and grabbed Thalia before diving out the window and shifting into my dragon form.


I heard a scream from the plaza and saw Jalad and his men, readying bows. I was sad until I heard,

“Rose and the king are in there. We need to save them!”

He had no clue who I was. It was like with Granny, she shot because she thought I was either dead or in danger and there was a dragon.

Their arrows hurt greatly, but I needed to keep flying.

“The dragon has an elf kidnapped!”

Thalia hadn’t shifted back yet, so it definitely looked like I was kidnapping her.

The king stepped out of the castle and yelled,

“Kill it, don’t let it escape!”

Mammon leapt up to my elevation and smashed his hammer on my wing. I roared but crashed outside the city limits.

My back was against the mountain pass and the group of 12 that had assembled closed in on me. The rest must have been too scared to attack.

I was in agony. The curse of that arrow weakened my scales and stopped me from regenerating. I was down to only 1000000 health.


We cornered the beast. Me and Jalad stepped forward. It cringed back.

I saw a cursed arrow in its eye. That’s how we were able to hurt it. Better kill it before the curse lets up.

“Dallel, you kill. I’ll make sure it can’t escape.”


The beast stopped growling and its eyes seemed to soften. That caught me and Jalad off guard, but it didn’t take advantage of the weakness to kill us. In fact, it laid down and exposed its neck.

“Jalad, don’t dragons normally fight back?”

“They do, but this one is accepting death?”

Somehow, I felt sorry for the beast. I decided to do a clean blow and chop off its head. I slashed down when I heard a clash of metal, and there was Sir Royce.

“Royce? What are you doing here?”

“Stopping you from making the biggest mistake of your life.”

Is this a review?



User avatar
1080 Reviews

Points: 344
Reviews: 1080

Tue Apr 02, 2024 1:57 pm
View Likes
vampricone6783 wrote a review...

Hello there, human! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!

Shalt we commence with the review?

Top Graham Cracker - The secret is out! Rose and Thalia are revealed to be dragons, and Jalad and Dallel will only have to figure it out for themselves!

Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - I think that you meant to write “knew”, in the beginning, but if not, then ignore this.

Chocolate Bar - My favorite parts would have to be when Rose protects Thalia and when Royce stops the Jalad and Dallel from killing her. Rose is trying to stop her sister from dying, and Royce is trying to protect Rose. Hopefully they still care about her…

Closing Graham Cracker - A chilling chapter where Rose’s true nature is revealed, and only what the question of what Jalad and Dallel will do next lies ahead.

I wish you an amazing day/night! :>

keeperofgaming says...

Thanks for the review. And yeah, the "know" was intentional.

User avatar
331 Reviews

Points: 66222
Reviews: 331

Fri Mar 15, 2024 4:10 pm
RavenAkuma wrote a review...

Hello Again, My Friend!

It's me, Raven, and I'd like to review the next chapter in this great story using my Familiar method! Let's dive in, shall we? Heh heh heh...

What The Black Eyes See...

Oh my gosh, this was the tensest chapter yet, and there was so much to break down! I was suspicious about Galswell, but I thought he would just catch on to the truth and threaten to expose Rose or something. I didn't expect an ambush, or for him to commit infanticide with Thalia's eggs! The fight with Rose had me at the edge of my seat, and the save from Royce was a huge relief. Let's get into the details though.

Where The Dagger Points...

No recommendations for content! Good writing job too, there was only one tiny, almost unnoticeable error I spotted here:

“She subjugated a fire dragon that made it’s nest in the dungeon.”

"Its" doesn't need an apostrophe.

That is all ~

Why The Grin Widened...

Ah, where to begin for this section?

Okay, you wrote the moment of Galswell entering the dungeon very well. The way both he and Thalia are immediately aware of each other and pick up on their strengths comes across strongly and builds tension right off the bat. I'm anticipating a close fight, or a tense negotiation, but you used one question to raise the stakes so much:

“Is Rose a dragon too?”

Goosebumps! Thalia's panic as Galswell closes in, and the desperation as he beats her -especially with the mention of her eggs was hard to read (figuratively not literally of course).

Swapping to Rose's POV, the ambush with dragonsbane immediately instilled anxiety; again, I wasn't expecting things to escalate so fast! However, Rose's anger toward the king and urge to protect Thalia was great to see. Another surprising and great moment was her realization of how the king could just misunderstand her. That really showed her more subtle empathetic side, and by extension, showed that this isn't Rose turning on all humans, not even the king himself. They're mostly just being manipulated by narratives generated by people like Galswell. I think that's a very moral quality of hers that shows her status as the "hero" of the story.

Also, I quite enjoyed this line:

By the time Galswell charged up his kill blow, his head had gone on a vacation.

Very satisfying and entertaining, a good balance for such a shocking and sad situation.

Mammon being the one to bring her down, followed by Jalad and Dallel being ready to make the final strike, was such a sobering moment; how even those with the most faith and support for Rose were the ones that came just seconds from killing her. Of course they don't understand it's her, but the idea is enough to mess with your brain, and keep you unsure of what will happen next.

I'm reminded of the line from Chapter 6 (I think it was), where Rose mentions how Dallel and Jalad have no reason to feel bad about her death, and they immediately protest. Will they still believe what they do? Will Rose change her stance on this, and more concerningly, will Jalad and Dallen change their stance on this?

And finally, Royce: he is awesome, coming through once again to help Rose where she needs it most.

Our Mad Thoughts...

Overall, awesome chapter! Really liked this one. I honestly would love an "Adventures Of Rose Hood" video game; the stat system fits and I see this being an awesome plot lol. Nicely done! :)


keeperofgaming says...

Thanks for the review, this is definitely the first of the absolute tense chapters.

also, thanks for the correction. I have no clue why they just don't have both as It's

keeperofgaming says...

And I do plan on trying to get it animated during the rewrite, so a video game would be awesome.

Noelle, you can lead a writer to their computer and give them coffee, but you can't make them write.
— CowLogic