The and before blank in stanza three is supposed to be a, but I'm too lazy to change it lol. Thanks for reading!
Hi there Momo! Let’s talk about your poem. For first impressions, I felt that the figure of “emotions” in this piece felt very difficult to grasp, very elusive. At the same time, they seemed to be monotonous, in the sense of having a common underlying frame despite maybe the surfaces changing. This seems to be a list poem, with each stanza being connected to the other by the structure and by being about the subject of emotions. A lot of the imagery here exists only in a metaphorical sense – each stanza is a long simile, “like a tangled headphones cord . . . like a rippling ocean . . . “and so on. The background picture used seems to reflect the first and second stanzas the most. “knots” are mentioned directly in the first stanza, whereas the shapes in the image to me also seem to resemble the spider web image of the second stanza.Subject and MeaningI interpreted the main message of this poem as ‘emotions are volatile’. What made me think this was the ‘main’ message was the title: “sometimes”, a word that is repeated many times throughout the poem to express how emotions can change. Another interpretation that I had was the paradox that: all emotions are constant in one thing, and that is their complexity. After all, “tangled” wires, “rippling” waters and clouds on the sky all share complexity in common. The use of parallelistic structures, where every list item begins with “emotions are like” and goes on for four lines, gives the poem a sense of regularity.Language and ImageryAs I mentioned earlier, I thought the three groups of images were connected by each being ‘complicated’. Was there a similar connection in mind for you when you were writing this piece?Within each group, there’s a sense of inconsistency in how connected the individual images are. For example “tangled headphones cord” makes me think of tech and devices, but the background image is of a thick rope, and I don’t usually think of wires as being “sticky” (unless something has been spilled on them or they’re melting in the heat?). “too interlaced to solve” also reminds me of a wire puzzle or something similar, though I can imagine that untangling headphone cords can feel like solving a puzzle sometimes! To contrast, the images in stanza 3 are all connected obviously to each other, since they’re all descriptions of the sky in different weather conditions.Some of the images I liked best were “spider’s web of squishy seaweed” and “like a tangled headphones cord”. They’re very unexpected – “spider’s web” seems to come out of nowhere in the stanza about the ocean, but then links back to it with the “seaweed”, while I don’t think I’ve heard someone compare emotions to a “headphones cord” in particular. So they were interesting to read.Sound and StructureThe poem, though it looks regular, has a somewhat irregular rhythm when read aloud. I think I expected that the first and last lines of each stanza would have a similar length, but I realised they’re each different when I read them aloud. I found the caesurae in the third line of each stanza very well placed.
sometimes sticky, sometimes smooth,sometimes too interlaced to solve.
emotions are like the sky,and blank and beautiful . . .
Hey Momo! Incoming review!It's always a treat to see some Momo poetry. Although, I don't think I've reviewed any. That ends today! On with the review!I'll start out by critiquing your work.
and blank and beautiful canvas of blue
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