I like to play with fragile strings
that snap and crack with each quick pluck
and I think this is good, to churn with care
to find semblance in the curl of rusted cords
tied too tight – a noose around your swollen hands,
or loose and new, springy but too cheap to
compose a decent set.
it’s like this, I feel, we play the same
the strums too rough and the notes all wrong
we keep cutting corners with unleveled steps
tripping over sidewalks in a mad dash towards nothing
but us, and we’re all queuing the same bad tracks
from that shitty album neither of us could afford
to make
it’s funny how we never learned to sing
but we’re still screaming at the top of our lungs
(help me, save me, love me)
~
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,733 Reviews
Very nice! I'm no good at reviewing poetry, so I'll stop while I'm ahead and just say that I like this piece
Great job, keep it up!
For the record, I like subtle swearing in poems, it just seems to come out of nowhere and add emotion.
Ok, I'm done rambling
This gives me a johnny cash feeling to it which is a good thing. I applaud the scenery within it and the tune of poverty in music that is tough to create because of the same souls being bottled up into one whining body. They couldn't afford much, but did the best they could with what they had. Somehow, they complain about what they don't have and whoever the leader is, they get tired of hearing the same old beats of the same old things. This is really well put. I strongly encourage you to keep writing Im pretty sure that you know that already considering your work lol but please make more of this type of work.