18+ Language Violence Mature Content

Revenge - best served cold

Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for language, violence, and mature content.

This one is a little violent… maybe even brutal. So, to anyone reading this, I hope you keep an open mind. I also hope I can keep you hooked with some twists and thrills all the way through.

Okay, here’s the thing—

I’ve watched so many movies and shows, especially crime stories. And in almost all of them, justice wins in the end. Whether it’s a good person getting revenge, or a bad person doing something evil—rich or poor, smart or foolish—it always ends the same way.

They say, “There’s no such thing as a perfect crime.”
No matter how clever someone is, they always leave behind a clue. Always.

But now…

I want to tell you a story.
And when it ends, I really want to hear what you think.

Because this one?

This might be little different I hope.

Chapter 1: "A Glance Across the Room"

There was a girl named Rhea who worked in a small, cozy café at the corner of a busy street. She had no family—an orphan who had built her life from scratch. Through years of struggle and hard work, she had managed to become independent and strong. Her life was simple, and her days passed in quiet routine, serving coffee and cleaning tables.

One ordinary afternoon, as she served a regular customer, the door jingled and a group of friends entered the café. They were loud, cheerful, laughing, and teasing each other. Their presence filled the space with energy. Rhea couldn’t help but smile as she watched them from behind the counter. It felt like a glimpse into a world she had never been a part of.

While looking at the group, her eyes landed on one of them—a guy who stood out from the rest. He was tall, neat, and had striking blue eyes. Something about him made her heart skip a beat. He looked confident and kind. In that one moment, Rhea knew she was drawn to him. She also knew someone like him probably belonged to a different world, far from hers. So she just watched silently, stealing glances whenever he wasn’t looking.

Days passed, and the group kept coming back. The café had become their regular hangout. And every time they walked in, Rhea's eyes searched for him. Her small, shy smile returned as she saw him laugh and talk with his friends. She never spoke to him—just looked, quietly, from across the room.

But what Rhea didn’t know was that one of his friends had noticed her. He had seen how her eyes always followed the blue-eyed boy. Something was changing. Slowly. Quietly.

And soon, her life was going to change.

Chapter 2: The Smile That Ruined Her

Rhea had always been invisible.

Not in a tragic way—just in the quiet, unnoticed way. She worked part-time at Brew Story Café, nestled near a lively college campus. She liked it there. The smell of roasted beans, the rhythmic steam from the coffee machines, and the corner tables where no one bothered her.

Then he walked in.

John Matthews.

He had the kind of presence that made people nervous. Rich, well-known on campus, and a magnet for attention. Wherever he went, laughter followed—sometimes loud, sometimes cruel. He had a group of boys who acted like the world revolved around their inside jokes.

The first time he walked in, Rhea noticed the eyes that followed him. He didn’t notice her. Not then. But his friends did.

“Hey, look—your admirer’s here again,” one boy smirked.
“The creepy café girl,” another added.
“Just ignore her, yaar,” someone said, chuckling.

John raised an eyebrow, glancing toward Rhea as she placed a tray on the table. He tilted his head and gave a slow, mocking smile. She looked up, just for a second—and it was all it took. Her heart fluttered. Something unexplainable stirred inside her.

She thought it meant something.

But to him—it was a game.

John didn’t like being teased. The comments from his friends made him feel challenged.

So he decided to teach Rhea a lesson. One she’d never forget.

The next day, she brought their table order, trying to avoid eye contact.

“Hi,” John said suddenly, flashing a warm smile.
“Uh… hi,” she replied, startled.
“Do you work here every day?”
“Just the evening shifts.”

He extended his hand.

“I’m John. Thought I’d properly introduce myself.”

She looked at the hand, then slowly shook it.

Click.

Behind them, a friend filmed the handshake, holding in a laugh.

That night, the video was everywhere online:
“Café girl crushing hard—look how desperate she is!”

Rhea stared at the screen in shock. Hundreds of comments flooded the post.

Next day

John walked in, alone this time.

“Hey, Rhea. I saw what they posted. I just wanted to say… I’m really sorry. I had no idea they were filming.”

She bit her lip. “It was humiliating.”

“I get it. And you don’t deserve that. Let me make it up to you.”

He extended his hand again.

She hesitated… but took it.

Click.


Another video.

“She’s falling for it—part 2 coming in hot.”


Days Later

He returned with flowers.

“Peace offering,” he grinned.
“Please don’t do this. People are laughing at me,” Rhea whispered.
“I just want to fix things. I feel terrible.”

His friends in the background chuckled, one nudging another, already recording.

Rhea wanted to believe him. The kindness in his voice… the way he apologized… Maybe it was genuine?

Until that day.

He came in alone again, quieter this time. Sat near the back.

She avoided his gaze. But he called out when she passed.

“Still mad?”
“I just want this to stop.”

“Okay, fair enough. Just… one last handshake. Clean slate. I won’t bother you after that.”

She stared at him. Was he serious?

“One last time?” he repeated gently. “I promise.”

She reluctantly reached out.

As soon as their hands met, he yanked her forward.

Before she could react, his arm wrapped around her waist and he kissed her.

Not a gentle kiss.
A performance.

Her tray clattered to the ground. She stood frozen, shocked.

Laughter erupted behind them.

Click.

Online Caption:
“Look how she lets him do it. She was into it the whole time.”

Her phone buzzed all night.

Strangers called her names. Threats. Jokes. Memes. Screenshots.

She confronted her manager the next morning.

“It wasn’t what it looked like. I didn’t ask for it—he just—”
“We’re not running a drama house here, Rhea,” 

her manager snapped. 

“The café’s image is important. Just… take a break.”

Everyone acted like it was her fault.

She passed two girls whispering and giggling.

“That’s the one from the video.”

“She looked like she wanted it. So fake.”

Rhea stopped walking outside altogether.

Her world shrank to her bedroom. She pulled the curtains. Deleted every app.

The light inside her dimmed, day by day.

Then one morning… she left.

No text. No letter.
Not even a note to her mother.

She disappeared.

All that remained were viral videos, a thread of hateful comments…

And the smile of a boy named John, who ruined a girl because his ego couldn’t handle a joke.

Chapter 3:What He Deserved—And What He Didn’t Expect

Years had passed since Rhea vanished from the world she once knew. Her scars had faded, but not her memories. She had rebuilt herself in silence, far away from the city that once broke her spirit.

One day, while traveling to a nearby town for work, she noticed a man sitting by the roadside, begging for money. His clothes were torn, his face rough and tired—but something about him was familiar.

She looked closer.

It was John.

The man who had once ruined her life, who turned her into a joke for the world to laugh at.

Even now, sitting on the pavement, he hadn’t lost his arrogant look. As she approached him, he looked up, not recognizing her at first. But then his eyes widened.

“You…” he said bitterly. “So now you’ve come to laugh at me? Is that it? Look at me! This is what I’ve become. You think I deserve this, right?”

He spat out the words, still angry, still defensive.

But Rhea said nothing.

She looked at him—quiet, calm—and placed a few notes beside him. Then she turned and walked away.

But that wasn’t the end.

Something inside her wouldn’t let her forget. She kept returning to that street corner, quietly offering him food or money, never asking for anything in return.

At first, he didn’t care. He still acted like the world owed him something.

But as days passed, something began to change in John. He started watching her silently. He saw the kindness in her eyes. No anger. No revenge. Just compassion.

And then one day, he whispered,

“I’m sorry… for everything. I was cruel to you. I destroyed your life. I don't expect forgiveness. But I had to say it.”

She didn’t reply. But she came back again. And again.

Slowly, he began to clean himself up. She helped him find small jobs. A few weeks later, he had a place to sleep, clothes to wear, and dignity starting to return.

One night, he told her everything.

“My parents disowned me. My siblings cut all ties. The so-called friends? They disappeared the moment my money was gone. I was left with nothing. But maybe I deserved it.”

She listened quietly. No judgment. No blame.

Over time, living under the same roof, something unexpected happened. They began to see each other differently. They talked late into the nights. They laughed at small things. She saw in him not the arrogant boy he once was, but a man who had suffered, broken, and was trying to rise again.

Then one evening, as the sun set behind their small window, he said,

“I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, let alone your love… but somewhere along the way, I fell in love with you. I’ve changed because of you. Will you marry me?”

Rhea looked at him.

And for the first time, she saw not the boy who had destroyed her, but the man who had rebuilt himself—with her by his side.

She smiled softly and nodded.

“Yes.”

Tears welled up in John’s eyes. And in that moment of quiet joy, he made a silent promise to himself:

"From now on, I will look after her with care and respect. I will protect her peace, and never let her be hurt again—not even by me. She gave me a second chance… and I’ll spend the rest of my life proving I deserved it."

And from that day forward, he did just that.

Of course. Here’s the revised version with that tender detail added, in a simple and emotional tone:


Chapter 4: The World in Their Small Home

After marriage, Rhea and John became a couple that everyone admired. They had no family from either side—his parents had cut ties long ago, and hers had passed away. But their neighbors slowly filled that space, becoming like family. In their little home, love lived quietly and warmly.

Days passed.
Months passed.
Years passed.

They were happy, but there was one thing missing—a child.

They wanted to be a complete family. They tried everything—doctor visits, prayers, treatments. Nothing worked.

They even applied for adoption, but their past and financial struggles made people hesitate. No agency came forward. They faced rejections everywhere. No doors opened.

Though they tried to smile and live normally, the emptiness grew heavier, especially for Rhea. She began slipping into depression. Her laughter faded. She barely ate or spoke.

John watched helplessly. The woman who once saved him was now slowly drowning in sadness. It broke him.

Their kind neighbors tried everything—inviting them over, bringing sweets, sharing stories. For a while, it helped.

But life had more pain in store.

John's parents died suddenly in a car accident. His siblings didn’t even inform him. They still held resentment and wanted no part of his life. With their passing, the last link to his past vanished.

The stress, grief, and burden triggered something in John.

He began forgetting small things—like where he kept the keys, or what day it was.

At first, Rhea thought he was just tired. But over time, the forgetfulness got worse. Doctors confirmed it—early onset amnesia.

Rhea was devastated. The man who once promised to protect her now needed her to protect him. She started watching over him constantly—his medicines, meals, everything.

Sometimes, John would forget where he was and wander outside. Rhea would panic and call the police.

A kind stranger would bring him back.
Then it happened again.
And again.
Too many times to count.

But through all his memory loss, one thing never changed—he always remembered her name.

No matter how lost he was, no matter how confused he became, whenever someone asked his name or where he lived, he would say just one word:
“Rhea.”

He forgot the house, the street, even his own age…
But he never forgot her.

Until one day

He didn’t return.

She waited. Filed a complaint. Asked around. Days passed.

No word.

No message.

No sign of John.

He was lost.

And this time… he never came back.

Chapter 5:The Mask

She didn’t vanish to forget.

She vanished to become.

They said she broke down, humiliated after that video. That she ran away in shame. But Rhea didn’t disappear.

She evolved. She made a plan with patience and discipline.

With nothing left to lose, she made a promise:

“You won’t fall when you’re powerful, John. You’ll fall when you finally believe you're safe. And I’ll be the reason you lose everything.”

Step One: SHadow

Rhea became a ghost.

She watched. Recorded. Learned.
She found out John had bullied more than just her.

Students. Juniors. Girls. Even staff.

It wasn’t random. It was a pattern—a sickness.
And every time someone spoke up, it vanished before reaching light.

Because his father bought silence like candy.

But Rhea had something others didn’t.

A gift. A brain wired like a machine.

Back in school, she was a quiet topper in cybersecurity electives.
By 15, she could crack passwords, mask IPs, ghost accounts.
What used to be a harmless curiosity… now became her vengeance engine.

She slipped into phones like whispers.
Retrieved deleted messages.
Cloned accounts.
Spoofed emails.

And slowly, she built a digital fortress of evidence:

  • Secret videos of assaults.
  • Screen recordings of their group chats.
  • Voice notes mocking victims.
  • Banking records, blackmail payments.

“You destroyed them in daylight,” she whispered one night, watching John laugh on a rooftop with his gang. “Now I’ll ruin you from the shadows.”

Step Two: suspension 

She waited for the perfect moment.

Exam day. Silence in the hall. John's back turned.

She slid the phone she cloned into his bag earlier.

Right before the first bell, she triggered it remotely.

Loud ringtone.

“Playboy Alert: Another Victim Waiting!”

Heads turned. Students gasped.
The invigilator yanked his bag open—inside were private videos of underage girls.

John stammered. His face went pale.

“I... this isn’t mine. I swear—”

Too late.

They threw him out.

He failed that year. His academic record, smeared.

But that wasn’t the kill shot.

Step Three: viral

That same day, a package landed on his father’s mahogany desk.

Encrypted USB. No name.

Inside? A graveyard of secrets.

Videos of John and his friends in locker rooms, rooftops, bedrooms.

Most damning—his friend unconscious, half-dressed on a couch.

John’s laughter. His voice saying:

“Bro, these girls are just toys.”

Rhea released everything online at the same time.

Using her custom scripts, she posted on forums, social media, news tip sites—within hours, it trended globally.

#RichRoguesUnmasked
#PredatorsOfPrivilege
#JusticeForTheSilenced

Faces were identified. Parents ashamed.
Media pounced. Protesters rallied.

Universities began expelling students.
Police opened cases.
Two of John's best friends were arrested.
One tried to flee the country.

And the final blow—

His father stormed into the room with the USB in one hand.

“You’ve ruined our name. You’ve made me a father of a monster.”

John dropped to his knees.

“Dad, I swear I didn’t film them! Someone’s framing me!”

“Doesn’t matter. Everyone believes you did.”

“Please—”

“From this day on, you're not my son.”

His accounts froze. His name was removed from every business document.
His face—plastered across media as a cautionary tale.

Rhea watched it all unfold, sipping chai in a dingy hotel room with a hacked news stream open.

And she whispered:

"I'm not finished"

Once a prince now homeless, dirty, begging for money sleeping on the road.

And she… watched. Every day. Every night. A soft smile on her face.

Until one day, she approached him.

He didn’t recognize her at first.

Then his eyes widened.
“You…” he whispered.
“You came to laugh at me?”

“No,” she said gently. “I came to help.”

A pause. He almost cried.

“You’re thinking I deserve this, aren’t you? Well… maybe I do. But I never thought it would come to this.”

She knelt beside him.

“Then don’t waste the help, take it."

Step Four: The Slow Death

She never planned to have children. Every failed pregnancy? Faked.

She made sure he felt the pain of emptiness, of being helpless.

Then… she began the real revenge.

Small doses.
Every day.
Mixed into his food.
A subtle, intracellular poison—one that targeted the mind, not the body.

He began forgetting things.
At first, little stuff. His wallet. His words.

Then names. Faces.

But one name he never forgot—Rhea.
Because she made sure of it.

“I forget everything,” he said once, trembling. “But I remember you. I always remember you.”

“That’s all that matters,” she whispered, kissing his forehead.

He wandered off often. Got lost.
The neighbors helped.
They pitied her. “Poor girl,” they said. “Such a tragic fate.”

No one suspected her.

Every time he returned, she welcomed him back… with another dose.

Step five: cold

Eventually, no one looked for him when he went missing. Not even his siblings. His parents were long dead. There were no loose ends.

One night, she watched him sit on the couch, blank eyes staring at the wall. He smiled weakly when he saw her.

“Rhea?”

“Yes, love.”

She walked behind him. Calm. Controlled.

Covered his mouth gently.
And drove the knife into his back.
Again.
And again.
And again.

He gasped, eyes wide in confusion.
Blood soaked through his shirt.

“You messed with the wrong woman,” she whispered in his ear.

He blinked…
And went still.

She sat beside his lifeless body for hours. Listening to the silence. Breathing slowly. Calm.

Then… she chopped him into pieces.

Fed them to dogs across the city. Tossed what remained into rivers and trash heaps.

The next morning, she walked out and told her neighbors:

“He’s gone missing again.”

They hugged her.
“Poor girl,” they said.
“May God give her strength.”

And Rhea smiled.

                    ***THE END***

Comments & reviews · 2
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D*MN BRO. I am NOT messing with you fs.

First of all, the 'john' character isn't just a character, I have unfortunately come across people like this in real life. And this is what they genuinely deserve. really like the demarcation into parts and steps, to lay on the whole 'no emotion, just cold, precise, planned revenge'.

Your writing made me root for Rhea, because she got back up and put people in their place, independently.

Really, john should've known better. He is repeatedly fake-nice to Rhea, but it's so inconceivable to him that she can't be as cruel as him. To him, his cruelty is an attribute of his that makes him superior, and being good equals being weak.

I love how Rhea took the time to plan and plot this, because to her, she doesn't try to take revenge by becoming better or that 'success is revenge' stuff.

Revenge is revenge, and she is hellbent on getting it because she knows she deserves it.

" But one name he never forgot—Rhea.

Because she made sure of it.

“I forget everything,” he said once, trembling. “But I remember you. I always remember you.”

“That’s all that matters,” she whispered, kissing his forehead."

“You won’t fall when you’re powerful, John. You’ll fall when you finally believe you're safe. And I’ll be the reason you lose everything.”

Even in his last moments, all he'll know is that one name that is going to haunt his soul.

"John watched helplessly. The woman who once saved him was now slowly drowning in sadness. It broke him." I really like how even though john becomes sorta better, Rhea will still go through with her revenge. She knows that redemption does not erase the sins of the past, and it does not erase what happened to her and all those other girls.

She is compassionate, kind, has conviction, brilliant and when necessary, resolute, collected, incredibly patient, cold and precise. love it, love her. She doesn't view her long-term revenge plan as a waste of time because it his her calling to right many wrongs.

Okay, I'll stop ranting now. But this work is amazing, and I would certainly read any ones with a similar theme.

Great work ! <3333

Hey..thank you so much for the positive views on my work. It really lifted my spirits. It's my first work in thi genre want to see how it goes..will definitely try

I'm certain your writing will improve more if this is your first work in this genre. Most of us go in knowing nothing, but the point is to go out learning something. <33

User avatar
TheRebel2007
Review

Hey there, Alwaysea! The Rebel here from Team Mint on Review Day to review your work!

An Overview: Your tale has a rather compelling premise - a perfect crime. However, the execution is a bit flawed - the two characters (I am not counting the friends and neighbours) are rather one-dimensional, they feel like machines who were created to follow the plot and the twists, instead of feeling like real people, just plot devices. However, you did a good job in the grammatical and syntactical part, and made it engaging enough for the average reader to get to the end. That's a good plus point.

The Criticisms: The two main characters - rather, the two characters (I don't consider the "friends" and "neighbours" to be characters per se) in your story are very one-dimensional, in the very literal sense. John, a rich playboy turned into a tragic amnesiac lover - one-dimensional, from -ve infinity to +ve infinity. Rhea, a shy, orphaned cafe-maid turned into a revenge-fueled psychopath - one-dimensional, same as before.

But, remember - one-dimensionalness in itself is not a bad thing. There are many fictional characters who are one-dimensional - Tanjiro (the embodiment of empathy but a talented demon slayer), Dr Doofenshmirtz (a mad scientist who dotes over his daughter), Severus Snape (a traumatised yet enigmatic potions master, a good guy at heart who wears adamantium on his sleeves) - in fact, most fictional characters are one-dimensional (in the sense of being paradoxical in the same spectrum of characteristic/personality). However, all of them share one particular thing - nuance. All of them are nuaced, fleshed-out characters who feel real. Sure - this is just a short story, and you are limited by the type of literature you are working with - however, you can still show little subleties. Follow the "show, not tell" rule - point out little subtleties in expressions, little characteristic actions or behaviours, little conversational patterns - all these little streams flow into a large river, creating a relatable character.

The Plothole: A major plothole, at least in my eyes, in the story is the fact that it never explained how Rhea managed to afford her gadgets. Sure, it says she was very smart, an orphan who fared well in academics, and a struggler who lived through tough times - but if that's true, she probably won't have much money left to buy laptops and expensive hacking tools one usually needs for such high-level cracking. And that's probably why she worked in the cafe. If the cafe work was just a front for her hacking career and even if she hacked into bank accounts - it should have been at least given a fleeting mention, or a foreshadowing. None of that happened. So the entire plot of the story feels like a deus ex machina bestowed by the author.

The Conclusion: I am sorry if this came off as too criticising, I am just trying to do my job. I believe you had a really good idea for a story, but just fumbled it in execution - it's okay, no promising author has ever been a success in one try. You were on the right path, finding ideas for a good plot - I am sure if you try more, read more and think more, you will definitely write a great story. You have great potential. That's all, happy writing!

Signing off,

The Rebel

Thankyou so much for reading and I'll welcome any kind of comments %uD83D%uDE0A



they got that magical iridescence that you don't expect to be on a sky rat y'know
— Ari11