Look, Look up

Hey-o! Guess who's back in the game! Gummy's the name, reviewing's my game! Tonight, I'll be reviewing "Look, Look Up" by yubbies21!

First off, let me start by saying that simple poems like these are the ones I like to review the most. The message is clear, the rhyme scheme makes it look clean, and the theme stays put through the entirety of the poem. So, yeah, I commend you for this!

I think this poem looks just fine without punctuation, so I'll skip that. The grammar is pristine, but that's not anything I wouldn't expect from you anyway.

My ideal, 100% personalized, ultimately perfect version of this particular piece... would be a fixed-verse poem. :3 (I don't know why, I just love them! They're so clean-cut like a line of toy soldiers!) As I mentioned before on a similar poem, the decision is entirely up to you, and it's not even close to a decision you NEED to take. I just feel like poems with a rhythm like this one could look even more organized with a fixed-verse. Again, this is all up to you, and it's all my personal opinion. So, no pressure. ._.

And that's it! I really like the style of this poem! I expect to see much more from you in the future, and remember, practice is key!

I love this poem, especially by its simple but effective rhyme and the powerful meaning behind it.

I love it how you repeat

'Look

Look up

and see you are never alone'

after each stanza, effectively highlighting the significance of these three sentences and most important, the key idea of the whole poem.

This is a very hopeful poem,


'When the challenges of life arise

and you longer can see the prize

Don’t just stand there and rant

face your fears and take a chance'

That is very true, a very beautiful poem indeed. Great job!

Wow, this is great! It's a very sweet and inspirational poem, I like it a lot! Just a couple things that I had issues with, but none very major.
One, the change in phrasing between the "look/look up/and see you are never alone" and the other verses is very difficult to adjust to. I sort of have to do a double-take every time it alternates, which jolts me out of the rhythm of the poem. I might change the first "look" to "look up", and repeat the phrase again for emphasis. I feel like it flows a little bit better.
The other thing is that, at times, it seems like there are words missing. For example, in the 5th verse, second line, you say "and you longer can see the prize", I believe there should be a "no" in there? Other than that, there are just a couple other places where you could mix up phrasing to make everything a bit more smooth and interesting.
Otherwise, I really like this poem. Thank you so much for writing, and I hope to see more of your work!