Place of Crowds: Another song

by niteowl

Published December 31, 2004

In Lyrical Loveliness

I walk here
Everyday
And everything's
Always the same

They laugh and talk
Carrying on
I walk among them
In silence
Unknown

And now
They've all disappeared
Leaving me alone

It's so eerie
When they're gone
And the silence seems so wrong
Here in a place of crowds

Walking on their footprints
The echo seems so loud
When you're alone
In a place of crowds

Comments & reviews · 4
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MatiasD
Review
MatiasD wrote a review Review · Dec 31, 2012

An alternative might be to focus on the emotions the performer creates and how that transfers to the audience. For example, maybe they dance as the player dances with their fingers. Or maybe the music reminds them of something.

Overall, this has a lot of excellent imagery and is well-written. If the strange imagery toward the end is re-focused, I think it would be a stronger piece. Good job and keep writing!

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CK Lynn
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CK Lynn commented Comment · Aug 30, 2007

I really liked it!

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Tara
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Tara commented Comment · Jan 23, 2005

It's beautifull, Tae! I love it! :D

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randy
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randy commented Comment · Jan 23, 2005

Holy crap! (Is that a curse? I don't know).

These are great! I love the last couple of verses. This is frekain' excellent.



This is a house of homes, a sacred place, by human passion made divinely sweet.
— Alfred Joyce Kilmer