Yeah it's me again... Whaaaaaat? I'm bored ok? :p
So... You're in an insane asylum right now? 
actually nevermind that, I seriously don't get the hidden message and I've read it twice so... WHAT IS IT??
(Find the hidden message. Its quite important)
Hello dear readers! I know you where expecting a hook but what the heck. I just wanted to tell you that this is a little story to take your mind off of all this scary stuff. I want to tell you a story about a man named Jonathan. Jon always liked writing. Today Jon is sitting at his desk tapping his pen against the fake wood. Suddenly the phone rings, a pleasant surprise! Jon has been waiting for this call. He has been accepted into his first job writing for tabloid called The New York Magazine.
Jon soon gets his first assignment. A piece on the hospitalization of Barbara Bush. Jon begins to write but to find more information Jon goes on the Internet. He finds that Barbara was hospitalized because of a respiratory disease. Later, Jon submits his piece and is surprised by the great reviews. Jon decides to relax and celebrate. Don’t worry. Nothing paranormal happens. And here you were thinking, "Ah, here is were it gets good."
We return to our friend Jon a month later. He has risen slowly through the ranks and is now a chief editor! He controls all under him and is now quite powerful in the ranks of the tabloid. We all know that with great power comes greed or selfishness (No not great responsibility.) Jon has become what you might call an egomaniac. He only thinks about himself. He values his opinion over all others. Jon looks down on his little empire. He rules all under him. Although he still takes orders from higher ups he commands all under him with a strict rule, punishing the slightest mistake with reprimand and criticism.
We come back to Jon a month later. He is now head of the tabloid. The original owner had recently passed away due to "Inexplicable causes". Jon is now what you might call a sociopath. For those who aren't as smart as others the word sociopath means someone who has almost no emotion. Someone who puts one thing like money or power in front of all others. Jon rules the entire tabloid. He holds every single soul who works in the tabloid under his tyrannical control. He fires all who make a single mistake, he costs people money, family, even life. Then, one day a small article slips out of the tabloid. It shows the truth cause of death of the original owner. After two court cases and countless lawyers it is revealed that Jon killed the owner. Jon is put into an insane asylum; his diagnosis is extreme sociopathic behavior.
Well that's the story. What’s that? What’s my name? Well you should know that already. It’s Jonathan.
(Please add reviews. I know this story isn't perfect and i want to make it better!)
Yeah it's me again... Whaaaaaat? I'm bored ok? :p
So... You're in an insane asylum right now? actually nevermind that, I seriously don't get the hidden message and I've read it twice so... WHAT IS IT??
its a theme in this story that is reflected by john as he begins to turn greedy and power hungry its a theme in this story that is reflected by john as he begins to turn greedy and power hungry
Remember the Frozen Reviewers!
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I got hooked on your short story from the very start of it because the beginning was so mysterious, and I like mysterious stories. I also love that there was not a single grammatical mistake in the whole narrative! This will be one of my favorite stories. Although, i think you should improve on giving the character a bit more personality. When the character in the story has more personality, readers are put on the brim of their seats. I know that it it hard to do this without dialogue, but I know you can do it if you try!
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Frozen Fahrvergnugens Ahoy! ~EllaBliss
This is intense, and your "hidden meaning" is not so hidden. So you're Jonathan, hmm? Well let me tell you something, Jonathan. You are not a sociopath. Your definition of a sociopath isn't even correct.
A sociopath is someone who doesn't feel emotion. Not almost no emotion. Sociopath's are born with this condition. They are very good at hiding the fact that they feel nothing. Sociopaths are generally the opposite of normal people. Normal people typically try to suppress their emotions, or hide from others because they are embarrassed. Sociopaths do the opposite in that they mimic emotion, like a parrot.
This Jon, or you as you've implied, can't be a sociopath. Sociopaths don't only care about money. They care that people think they feel. They care about manipulation. I think this was well written. It seems like a conversational piece.
I have no nitpicks, merely an observation. At first, I thought I was reading an author's note, and then I would get to the story. You launch straight from that into this piece, listing the things that happened to Jon or the things that he caused. This worked, because I felt like I was reading a personal letter or having a conversation with you. Surprisingly enough, I like that. I enjoyed this.
If you are Jon, I'm sorry. I don't know you. What I'm doing right now is typing cold hard letters on a machine. I can't offer you comfort, though I try. But you are a beautiful person. I know you aren't a sociopath because you published this story. That shows me that you regret what happened to you, and you feel the need to confess. In the last few paragraphs as you described what "Jon" did, you describe it as this awful inhuman thing. That shows me you regret it. Regret is not something a sociopath can have. You will be okay. If you ever want to talk, PM me. I'm always here. Have a happy review day, and Keep Writing.
-Gravity
*facepalm* did you... send me something (because I didn't get it)? Or is there some hidden clue amidst my wall... I'M NOT GOOD AT THIS.
Hmm... is this about Stalin, or is it just that I recently read Animal Farm in school...
darn. Though that would work... kind of. Not really. Hmm... I honestly have no idea.
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