Last Winter

This was quite lovely. You had pretty good rhythm even if it was a bit stiff in places, and you visuals were also pretty good. One thing I didn't like that much was some of your rhymes.
For example:
"My lover’s done much more than that
much worse than petty lies.
I know I’m duller than a brat
because he’s fooled me twice."

It just sounded awkward. No one says "I know I'm duller than a brat..." in real life, and Naturalness and reality are what really matter when you try to rhyme. I'd look at some thesauruses and try rearranging some sentences. I know this poem's a lot less.... itself when it doesn't have the rhyme, but if you throw it out, it might sound better and more professional. Don't let yourself be the slave of your rhyming.

Your story line was pretty good too. I just think it was influenced by your rhymes a lot more than it should have been.

My favorite stanza was your last stanza. I felt a little bit of Schadenfreude I must admit. Sorry, but she was getting on my nerves, your narrator.
Good Job all together, You have quite a lot of talent!
Keep writing!
-Fortis Fortitude

I really loved this ballad, Rosan.

Though the gender is not specified, I’m assuming the perspective is of a girl and her brother. On the surface, you have a cold winter scene where she is at the threshold of a cliff, resisting her brother’s efforts to pull her closer and to safety. Tormented by the thoughts of her lover, as she repeats that he has done much worse than lie to her – she struggles to break free, holding back tears. He does his best not to let go, but there is no saving her. Tears stream down his cheeks as he loses his grip, hitting him hard that she will fall; and she does. Slowly zoom out as her body lies limp in the pure white snow that’s slowly turning to red. Her last words, or at least what she wanted them to be, was gratitude for letting her fall.

As a metaphor, I would say her death at the end may symbolize a sort of defeat, that she is going back to her lover, even though he is clearly the antagonist here. Her brother did his best to protect her, but ultimately it was her choice. Whether her choice was right or wrong, she feels appreciative to have made it herself.

This really hits home with me, because I knew a girl in real life with a similar [abusive] relationship, and in the end she took her own life. I'm sure many of us know someone like that, or have heard the story. This poem brought up a lot of mixed emotions in me.

This poem could mean several different things to lots of different people, though. It was a fun read, really nice flow, and a nice challenge to unravel. You're talented! I'll definitely check out more of your writing.

Kora

This is really good I like the way you've written it. I also like how it's written from a metaphorical view. I don't think I could have done that, and it really made me think about how it's written. Overall I think it's brilliant. Well done

I absolutely loved this poem. My interpretation of the theme was that a girl has a love who has tricked her and her brother doesn't want her to be hurt, but he finally lets her go. The girl wanted to fall, and she was pleading with her brother to let her go. This was a very beautiful piece, and I really don't have any criticism other than on the last stanza, I think the third line needs a period at the end instead of a comma. Otherwise, amazing work. You are truly a great poet.