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139,537 Literary Works • 672,600 Reviews
Heyo, Braiden here for a review on Review Day!
Okay, so this poem was awesome. It had a great story behind it and it was just plain savage. My thoughts when reading it were: "Okay, there's a beautiful girl... she has many suitors... oh crap, she killed them... OH CRAP SHE KILLED THE OTHERS TOO; SHE'S KILLING EVERYONE."
Such a great ending, if I do say so myself. It had a really intense wording to give it the emphasis of her independence that was the point of the whole poem. Fantastic job.
Keep wring! You're great at it!
~Braiden
*gulps* That wasn't slightly frightening at all, even then, I enjoyed reading it very much. Its haunting, but beautifully interesting. I can easily tell the timeline of when this is, her character as a human being, how pretty she is, how she looks. Please keep writing more, because this is quite fascinating.
Ohh, I really like this - the flow you have is excellent, and I just love the idea behind the poem (it sounds like the "lady" is actually a villainess? That's one of my biggest kinks tbqh).
My only critcism is:
The dukes, the earls and emperor
who tried to make her theirs.
Were faced with bloody terror
when she pushed them off the stairs.
After the "theirs", I don't think should there be a period. It just interrupts the flow which is almost near perfect.
This is a good poem, nice work! Short and quick to the point, but sometimes that is better.