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140,799 Literary Works • 673,688 Reviews
Thank you for all the positive feedback guys!
This was a lovely poem! While I expected it to be just fluffy and romantic it took a tragic turn in the last stanza which was unexpected. My favorite lines were the first two lines in the third stanza "My heart accepted, mind denied. To seal the fact I tried, I tried." I really like the depiction of the phrase "I tried, I tried."
Keep up the good work!
Nice poem.
Oh my! This is one of the best poems I have EVER read!!! It is amazing! I have no complaints, I love the message and I feel the same way it is describing! Keep writing I would love to read more from you!!!!!!!
I really liked this poem! There is such a beautiful "flow" in the language, and I sense a bit of a melancholic undertone.
1. Well done for using rhymes in the piece. The one thing I thought about straight away is that your use of rhyming words in the end of each sentence of the stanzas made it... a bit limited, per se. The nature of the language in your poetry would come across as more natural if you used rhyming words every other sentence, instead of each one. Then again, I guess that's a matter of preference.
2. There is a very concrete timeline throughout the poem, which I must applaud you on. You have managed to capture the change of an emotion throughout a lifetime beautifully, which is a hard thing to do in just a few sentences.
Again, well done! I'm looking forward to seeing more of your work.