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125,029 Literary Works • 672,781 Reviews
Hello again!
I liked your poem very much. There were no grammatical errors, but you did, however misspell a word or two.
It kind of seemed to me like you either thought about it before and typed it out quickly, or you were in a rush. "Remeber" should be "Remember". And "escapess" should be "escapes".
Overall, I give it 4 1/2 stars!
Sincerely,
~Swiftfurthewarrior
I really liked it and didn't see much to critique. One thing I did see is in the third stanza
I feel the storm,
Ringing in me.
The great boom of thunder.
The flashes of the light,
All so remind me,
Of flashes of our lives.
"The flashes of the light" I think it would sound better if it was "The flashes of light" instead.
Thats all I saw, keep up the good work!
Hey, thanks for choosing me as a critic
Hey so both the content and the rhyme was a bit dissatisfying. I personally believe you can change rhyme scheme if it sounds right, but this simply doesn't sound right. It was very weak through the poem and suddenly you end it here:
As for the content, the last line throws me off. Since you are comparing the thunder to flashes of our lives you are basically saying, let rainstorms continue, and metaphorically: let us our life continue flashes of our lives. Doesn't really say much in the end. There is always different interpretations to a poem and i'm not saying this review is fact but to me I just didn't like it. Sorry
Anyways, I would like to thank you again for me being your critic !
Thank you for critiquing, even though you didn't like it.