Equivalent of Hearts

it's so good I like it


Fear equals to bravery
when two hearts collide.

Bravery equals to courage
when two hearts divide.

Courage equals to longing
when two hearts realize...

Longing equals to contentment
when two hearts abide.

I really love the pattern and the rhythm in this poem because it gives a bit of life to words(Yes, I know it sounds corny, but it's true). I also love the format of it, the consistency in it, because it makes the poem a bit easier to follow. That said, some of the wording was a little confusing, the "equals to" in particular is what I'm thinking about. I see it as a bit of odd wording, but that could be just me. But other than that, I really liked it. It was incredibly romantic in my opinion, and I'm amazed how quickly you were able to grasp the romantic factor, since it's your first in the genre. There's a lot of real world connection in it, and I love that. keep it up:)

Hi Rainn. I really like your poem. It's short and to the point. It has a great construction to it, especially considering how you built idea on top of idea. Great work!

-BiancaLU

I personally love the length on this poem. It stops at the perfect pint, which shows very good skill. Sometimes it is difficult to stop, then it becomes a mumbo jumble. I like when you say how the hearts realize that its so much easier together . Very moving, and sweet. I hope to see more sooonnnn.

Wow, this is great. I love it! I really like your length too, it's not too long or too short, as I totally get your meaning here.
I really like your ideas here too, oh my God they're awesome. I love how you've made this work, it's so real and the reader can easily relate and understand!
You've done a great piece of work, I am anticipating your next uploads!
-CFG

Hello! It's yubbies21 here to review this for the Knights of the Green Room Fair Food Fight!

This poem is a bit short to get the reader into it, I would lengthen it a bit. It's hard to grab a reader when your poem is so short. It just doesn't feel right, the words just hang there in the last stanza.

The rhyme isn't forced, it sounds beautiful. When I read through the poem the first time, I didn't even catch that. Subtle rhymes are the best!

There are a lot of deep images in this poem, and I didn't understand it at first. When I read it the third time, I finally got it.

Keep Writing!

yubbies21

That was perfect! It was smooth and easy to understand and it just flowed right off the screen great job!

You nailed it. A perfect smooth follow up from one stance to another.
As a reader I felt myself travel along with your poem.
The end was apt and kept us all wanting for more.
A great work which you successfully managed to put it in 8 lines. Short and sweet.
Cheers.
Usero!!